


Yellow Shoes

by TeaEnthusiast



Category: Real Person Fiction
Genre: Academy Awards, Acting, F/M, Shoes, Singing
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-02-07
Updated: 2017-10-01
Packaged: 2018-09-22 15:19:35
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 10
Words: 35,107
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9613508
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TeaEnthusiast/pseuds/TeaEnthusiast
Summary: Ophelia Callis is 17 year old actress about to star in a Sword and Sandal Epic movie. There is only one problem; She can't stand her co-worker Oscar Isaac. As tensions flare and songs are written, things might not be what they appear to be...(Story as well as extras for it can be found on my tumblr; http://teaenthusiast65.tumblr.com/)





	1. Chapter 1

Being nominated for an Oscar was arguably the highlight of any actors career. It took most of them years and countless flawless performances to get onto the academy’s radar just to receive the honor of a nomination, let alone winning one. To be nominated for two Oscars in one year, when I was only a few months shy of my nineteenth birthday, was something I could never have even dreamed it seemed so far-fetched.

And yet here I was, standing on the red carpet in a crimson Ziad Nakad dress. Teamed with a pair of earrings worth sixty-seven thousand dollars and an Oscar De La Renta ruby necklace. All tied together with a beige pair of Giuseppe Zanotti heels.

My skin had been caked in pale make-up so I appeared to have the complexion of a porcelain doll, broken by scarlet lips. My long red hair was pulled back into an elegant braid-like design that I could not see but was assured that it looked amazing. Every part of me was flawless.

Yet as I stood smiling for the camera’s my mind drifted away from the event that I had dreamed of being a part of to the small golden chain around my wrist, the delicate heeled shoe pendant glistening against the dozens of flashing lights in front of me.

I had no idea how much the little pendant cost, but it would easily be the least expensive part of my outfit. It gave me comfort to know that it was there with me, signaling to one person and one person alone that he was still on my mind and in my heart.

But I could not dwell on that now as my handler lead me away from the camera’s to a reporter a little ways down the carpet. I clutched the sides of my gown, lifting the skirt slightly so that I could walk without tripping

“Ophelia Callis!” announced the reporter as I approached.

“Hello.” I greeted as I came to a stop and released my handfuls of dress.

“Now Ophelia this is your first time at the Oscar’s isn’t it?” asked the peppy reporter.

“Yes it is.” I smiled.

“And you are nominated for Best Supporting Actress for Agamemnon and Best Lead Actress in The Room, is that correct?” asked the reporter.

“Right again.” I smiled, though it kind of annoyed me when reporters would ask questions they already knew the answer to.

“And how do you feel right now?” she asked, thrusting the microphone up to my face.

“Nervous, excited, scared and a little bit hungry.” I said honestly, which caused the reporter to laugh.

“What have you eaten today?” she asked.

“Not enough obviously.” I quipped.

“So do you think you have a good chance of winning tonight?” she asked curiously.

“Absolutely not! Have you seen my competition?” I asked incredulously, “I’m up against Meryl Streep! No one wins against Meryl.” I scoffed, “Honestly it’s just an honor to even be nominated let alone for two different performances.”

“Let’s talk about your first nomination for your role in Agamemnon, now your performance has been compared to that of Heath Ledgers Joker, because of just how chilling and frightening they both are, how do you feel about that?” she asked curiously.

“Honestly I think there is no comparison. Heath’s performance was amazing. Mine doesn’t even come close.” I said firmly.

“Alright and what about your role in ‘The Room’, which is being hailed as one of the greatest performances of all time?” she asked.

I sighed as I thought through my words, I was no stranger to the over-the-top compliment, but I was still learning how to respond when such things were said, “I just showed up on set every day and tried to do my best. I really worked at not only giving a great performance for myself but for Chris as well,” I began.

“Chris Pine, your co-star.” She interrupted.

Yes Chris Pine my co-star. Who else would I be talking about? “Yes.” I replied simply, “I wanted to give Chris as much as I could so he could really have something to work off.”

“Yes, you have had a busy year.” Commented the Reporter, “Can you tell us about your amazing work ethic?”

“I get bored easily. So it’s not really a work ethic so much as a short attention span.” I explained.

She laughed again, “Can you tell us what you think of Chris Rock hosting tonight?” she asked.

“It’s going to be great. Though to tell you the truth every time I hear his voice I just see the Zebra Marty from the Madagascar movies.” I said honestly.

“That’s excellent.” Said the reporter, laughing before she turned to stare directly at the camera to give spiel about the two movies I was nominated for.

As she talked I let my gaze wander down the carpet to see the other celebrities at the event, George Clooney was giving an interview to my left so I turned to my right and my heart leapt up into my throat.

There, a couple of yards away was Oscar Isaac. Looking stunningly handsome in a tuxedo, his dark hair was slicked back and shone under the dazzling sun.

I’d only been watching him for a second when his dark gaze moved away from the reporter and met mine across the carpet.

I knew there was a camera on me and that I had to keep my face neutral but I could not fight the shy little smile that tugged at my lips at seeing him again after so long apart.

He answered with a timid smile of his own, not able to risk anything more than that. I watched as his eyes trailed over my body, taking in my whole appearance. I was suddenly very self-conscious of the way I was standing and how I looked. I knew I looked beautiful, but did I look beautiful to him? Did he see me and still see the girl he wanted? Or had I become someone he no longer recognized? There were moments when I woke up and I couldn’t even recognize myself anymore.

But my worry was short lived as his gaze met mine once more, everything I had wanted to see was there, his dark eyes smoldered as they burned into mine. But it was only there for a moment, before he schooled his face into an appropriate mask and smiled a little too enthusiastically. As if we were just old friends noticing one another across the carpet.

I gave a small wave in response. We were being watched. We had to play our parts.

“Who are you waving at?” demanded the reporter.

I tore my gaze away from Oscar and looked back at the reporter, “Oscar Isaac.” I smiled, as if saying his name did not cause my heart to ache.

“How do you feel about his nomination for Best Actor in Agamemnon?” she asked.

“Very deserving.” I said diplomatically as I chose my words carefully, “He was an absolute force of nature on set so it makes sense that it translated into his performance and he was nominated.”

“That’s great.” She smiled, “Good luck tonight, Ophelia.”

“Thank you.” I smiled as I grabbed two fistfuls of my dress again and moved away, following my handler once more.

Now that I was free from the direct line of a camera I let my expression drop as I stared at my feet, concentrating on not stepping on the hem of my dress.

I really had to marvel at how Oscar and I had gotten here. To a place where we could not even smile at one another in public without fear of what people would say about it. What they would think and more dangerously what they would print.

He’s thirty-eight and she’s eighteen, that’s a twenty year age gap! How inappropriate for them to be together! Ophelia is just another child star that has ruined her life. Oscar is taking advantage of her! What must her parents think? They had obviously gotten together before she was eighteen, that’s against the law…

We had come so far from where everything had begun.

…

I fluffed my hair for what felt like the thousandth time that morning and checked my outfit; I was wearing my lucky yellow pumps with a white skirt and beige top. My denim jacket resting on the bathroom counter along with my white handbag. I fiddled with my gold necklace nervously, today was the first day I would be meeting the star cast of the new movie I was in, called Agamemnon. Which wasn’t so much about the Greek’s invasion of Troy but the events leading up to the climactic event with the wooden horse. As well as what happened afterwards.

It was an all-star cast, Jenifer Lawrence as the beautiful Helen of Troy with James McAvoy as her husband Menelaus. Nicholas Hoult would be playing Paris, who steals Helen from Menelaus. Richard Madden was playing Prince Hector, elder brother to Paris, and Oscar Isaac would play Agamemnon, elder brother to Menelaus. Russell Crowe was playing Priam, King of Troy and father to Hector, Cassandra and Paris.

I had been cast as Cassandra, the sister of Paris and Hector who predicts the downfall of Troy. The role itself was quite interesting as not only was Cassandra a prophet, but she was a little insane which brought with it a unique challenge. One that I normally would have been happy to rise to, but now I felt the pressure of my acting needing to be of the same standard as the brilliant actors around me. At aged seventeen I was the youngest and most inexperienced cast member and I felt that stigma with every move I made.

Instead of tackling that insurmountable fear, I had decided to fret over what I was wearing.

Assuring myself that I indeed looked fine, I headed out of the bathroom and made my way down the hall to the meeting room at Universal Studios in LA.

The movie had taken such a long time to be put together, as epic Historical films often were, now that I was finally getting to sit in a room and read through the script with the other actors I could hardly believe it. I’d spent almost an entire year auditioning for the role of Cassandra only to find out I had gotten the part three months ago. That time had been spent negotiating contracts, sorting schedules, then doing costume fittings and make-up tests. Now we were all getting final copies of the elusive script after extensive rewrites before we began shooting next week.

It was all such a big shift from my normal acting life. I had of course acted in movies before, but they had all been relatively small budgeted, under the five million dollar mark. This film had over one-hundred million in budget! With the exception of the X-Men movie that had launched my career but I had only been on one scene at the end of the movie. I had been quite young and the magnitude of the film had really been sheltered from me.

My normal work day was spending four months in Vancouver working on the ‘X-Men Origins’ television series for HBO. I played a teenaged Jean Grey opposite McAvoy’s young Professor X. After the success of the movies, the studios had decided to turn the franchise into a series. And thus began my career as an actress.

I’d actually heard about the part of Cassandra from James, who had been given his part of Menelaus without auditioning. Lucky Bastard.

If it wasn’t for him I doubted I would have had the courage to even audition for a movie like this, let alone act in one.

Despite having been acting since I was thirteen, I still found auditions to be a frightful process and longed for the days when my talent would be as well-known as James and not have to audition for parts. 

Walking down the hallway I spotted a dark haired man standing in front of a vending machine, jabbing at the buttons angrily as he tapped the side of the machine loudly.

It only took me a moment to realize that the man was Oscar Isaac himself.

My breath caught in my throat and I did an awkward half step as I almost stopped in shock. Oscar Isaac was a brilliant actor and one I had admired for quite some time. His performances as the bad guy in ‘Sucker Punch’ and ‘Robin Hood’ were absolutely brilliant, but his roles his lead roles in movie like ‘Inside Llewyn Davis’ showed off not only his whole range as an actor but as a performer who was not only charismatic and charming, but could sing and had a real intelligence about him.

I’d seen a lot of his movies, but seeing him in person was different; he was taller than I had imagined and his skin was a little more tanned than it appeared in movies. And he was, of course, extremely handsome. His chiseled jaw and wide brown eyes were the defining features of his face; he had a dark dusting of facial hair around his mouth and jawline that I found ruggedly handsome. 

Taking a deep breath I continued on my way. Trying to keep my head held high and deliberately not stare at Oscar like I wanted to. As I approached he smacked the machine in frustration before he turned to look at me, “You got a dollar?” he asked.

It took me far longer than it should have to realize he was talking to me, “Oh.” I said in shock as I realization dawned on me, yes, he was talking to me. No I had not imagined it, “Yes.” I replied as I opened my handbag and fished around inside for my wallet; I found a crumpled green note of American money and held it out to him, “Here.” I smiled.

“Thanks.” He replied, eyeing me for a moment in what seemed to me to be a very critical look before he took the dollar and placed it into the machine.

I stood awkwardly for a moment waiting for him to speak to me again as anxious and excited butterflies flapped wildly in my stomach.

He looked over at me, seeming confused, or annoyed, that I was still there.

Taking the hint, I quickly scurried away, flicking my long red hair over my shoulder I rounded the corner of hallway, releasing a breath I hadn’t realized I’d been holding. My first interaction with one of my favorite actors had consisted on five words from him and one from me. Unremarkable by anyone’s standards yet my heart was beating so fast in my chest I thought it sounded more like a hum than a beat.

Smiling like a dazed idiot, I made my way down to room three-hundred and four that would serve as our meeting room.

  


	2. Chapter 2

“Ophelia! Look here, Ophelia!”

“Ophelia, over here!”

“This way! Look this way!”

The mindless shouting of the photographers at the Oscars was enough to make anyone glaze over in boredom.

“Turn your head, Ophelia!”

“Smile! Smile for the camera!”

“Hand out! Put your hand out!”

I reminded myself they were just doing their jobs and not deliberately annoying me as they shouted at me as if I were some animal at an auction they were all bidding over.

“Turn around! Let’s see the back of the dress!”

“Look here! Look here!”

“Stick your toe out! Let’s see the shoes!”

I turned this way and that, letting my mind go back to that first day in LA. My first meeting with the entire cast and our first table read.

…

Taking a deep breath I knocked on the door politely before I hesitantly poked my head inside to look around.

The first person I spotted was Jennifer Lawrence; her blond hair was glowing in the sunlight like some sort of halo.

As soon as she saw me, she smiled, “You’re here!” she exclaimed as she got up from her seat, “I’m so glad there is another girl here!” she said as she came over to me and immediately pulled me in for a hug.

I tapped her back awkwardly as I stooped down into the hug; I was a little taller than her. But then again, I was taller than most girls. And guys for that matter.

“It’s nice to meet you.” I said as she pulled back to look at me.

“Like wise.” She smiled, “I’ve heard so much about you from James.”

Despite having technically starred in an X-Men movie together, Jennifer and I had never actually met. I had a small scene in the last X-Men movie, which served as a launch for the television series that I starred in.

“I feel like we’re gonna be best friends.” She proclaimed as she dragged me over to the table to sit with her.

“Excellent, so we are only waiting on Oscar and Russ.” Said Ridley, the director of the movie as he sat down at the head of the table. I sat a seat down from his left.

I of course was a fan of Ridley’s work; Gladiator and Robin Hood were some of my favorite movies. Working with Ridley Scott had been another reason why I had wanted to do this film so badly.

Nicholas Hoult was sitting in the seat behind Jennifer, “Hey, I’m Nick, it’s nice to meet you.” he said politely, offering his hand to me.

“Like wise.” I smiled as I shook his hand, marveling at how pale he was and how smooth his skin appeared to be. He too was taller than I expected.

It was then I noticed James was sitting on the opposite side of the table to me.

“Hey, long time, no see.” He smiled.

We had seen each other yesterday when we had both gotten on the plane from Vancouver to LA, having wrapped our latest season of ‘X-Men Origins’.  

Next to him was Richard Madden. Two things that immediately struck me about him was that his eyes were a startling blue and that his beard had slight tinges of red within it that contrasted against his dark hair.

“Hi, I’m Ophelia.” I smiled.

“Rich.” He smiled.

“I thought you went by King of the North.” I joked, thinking back to his famed show Game of Thrones that I was also a fan of.

“Only on special occasions.” He winked.

I smiled in spite of myself, I was suddenly glad that most of my scenes would be with him. And Russell of course. I got a very generous feel from Richard that was a good thing when we would be acting together.

I had already met Russell who, upon meeting me, exclaimed that I reminded him of a ‘young Nicole Kidman. Only better looking.’ We had done a screen test together as part of my auditioning process and apparently our chemistry as Father and Daughter had been what sold Ridley on my getting the part.

The relationship between Priam and Cassandra was a complicated one. It was that of love between and Father and Daughter, but also one of resentment as it had been on Cassandra’s advice that Paris had been sent away from Troy as a child.

The door opened to reveal the grey head of Russell Crowe, Oscar was right behind him with a bottle of drink.

“Guess who I found having an argument with the vending machine!” said Russell in way of greeting.

“I won.” Said Oscar, holding his drink up as evidence before he went and sat down next to Richard.

“Nicole!” exclaimed Russell as he came over to me; his arms open wide in a hug.

I laughed as he remembered our joke, “Hi, Russ.” I said as he pulled me in for a hug.

“So nice to have another Aussie on set.” He said as he pulled back to look at me, “someone to talk Football with.”

He had a point. When I was on set in Vancouver, surrounded by Americans, I often lost my Australian accent and could not talk about things from my homeland. With Russell around, I knew that would not happen.  

“Great, now that everyone is here you can all get the final drafts of the scripts.” Said Ridley as he pulled out a large stack of papers.

“Oh, it’s like Christmas.” Said Jennifer as she grabbed her stack of papers.

I smiled as I was handed one, my name ‘Ophelia Callis’ water-marked onto every page.

I flicked my eyes over the script but I was distracted, I gazed up through my lashes at Oscar to see if he gave any sign that he remembered me from the hallway. His eyes were trained on his script; he had not acknowledged my presence at all since entering the room.

Suddenly he looked up and I immediately looked down at my script, my cheeks burning red in embarrassment. I didn’t want to be caught ogling, though I feared I had been. This was not a great start to my working relationship with him. I could not have him thinking I was some crazy fan girl itching for an autograph.

Admittedly, I did want his autograph, but I would never ask for it! Not in such a professional setting.

“Right, have at it, folks.” Said Ridley and with that, we began the read-through.

Reading our lines at the appropriate times, I very firmly kept my eyes on either my script or on the actor I was reading against. I watched Oscar with rapt attention whenever he read but tried to let my attention drift to whomever he was acting across but I was always watching him out of the corner of my eye.

I couldn’t help it. His presence was just so magnetic to me that he constantly had my attention.

Watching Oscar act was amazing! It was like getting an acting lesson on how to really act while watching an amazing performance all in one. If I had been in awe of him before I was even more so now.

It struck me as odd though that Oscar never looked at me when I was speaking. His attention was always focused on the actor opposite me in my scenes, never on me. Was my acting really that terrible that he couldn’t be bothered to watch? It was just basic politeness to pay equal attention to all your co-stars and I saw him watch Jenifer, Russell, Richard, James and Nicholas, but never me.

It must have been because my acting bored him. I was beyond nervous in the lead-up to my scene with him. I was determined to prove myself to him. I wanted to prove that I was a good actress, worthy to work alongside him.

After capturing the city of Troy, Agamemnon has Cassandra brought to his chambers and asks her to tell him his future; she predicts his untimely demise which will come about before he ever has a chance to rule Troy. He then has her killed.

“ _I have heard that you foretold the downfall of Troy the day your brother was born_.” Said Oscar, “ _That you warned your Father. Had he heeded your advice, Troy may yet belong to your family. Tell me my future_.”

He did not look up from his script when he finished talking as was customary, instead he continued to stare at his script with a bored disinterest.

Squaring my shoulders, I readied myself for the challenge he had presented me; was I a good actress? He would soon find out.

“ _Everyone wants to know their future, until they know it._ ” I replied darkly, working to make my voice sound scattered like someone who had lost their mind but also knew too much.

“ _You are no longer a Princess of Troy. I could throw you to my men like I did Menelaus’s wife, by morning all that would be left of you would be a scrap of meat not even a dog would have_.” He said harshly.

There was so much venom in his words that it caused a shiver to go down my spine. He truly was an amazing actor.

“ _You will never rule Troy_.” I said spitefully, fueled from his harsh words from before, “ _Your crown as King of Greece will be your doom for the steps you have taken to place it upon your head. Your life will be taken by one you cast aside._ ” I said solemnly, feeling stupidly inadequate in the acting department against him.

“Ok, good.” Said Ridley interrupting the dark look I was casting at Oscar, “Next scene.” He instructed.

Oscar looked up from his script, his eyes instantly trained on Ridley.

I stared at him, willing him to look my way so that I could see what he thought of my performance. Just a glimpse was all I needed, some sort of acknowledgement that I was his co-worker and not some small time television actress who had no business acting against any of these great stars.

As Russell began speaking, Oscar turned his attention to him, never once looking my way or acknowledging me at all.

Giving up I turned back to my script with a scowl. Though he had said nothing, his words spoke volumes.

In that moment I was determined to show him that I was a good actress. That I was damn good at my job and I would defend myself against anyone who thought otherwise. Even the likes of him who I had placed on such a high pedestal.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Not a good beginning to our couple. But don't worry, everything is not what it seems.


	3. Chapter 3

I moved down the line of reporters to one in a sparkled silver dress. She was obviously from some fashion magazine or blog because she was so fashionably dressed.

“Ophelia Callis! You look beautiful.” She greeted holding her sparkly microphone out to me.

“Thank you.” I smiled.

“Now I don’t know if you’ve heard but you are already being hailed as the best dressed this year.” She smiled, turning to the camera as she spoke, “How does that make you feel?” she asked curiously.

“That is such a huge compliment.” I smiled.

Actually it felt more like justice than a compliment considering it had taken me an entire month and various phone polls from my friends to finally choose the dress I had.

“So you’re at the Oscar’s. Arguably one of Hollywood’s biggest events of the year. Are you nervous?”

“Absolutely! I always get nervous at these kind of events.” I replied.

“Why’s that?” she asked curiously.

“Well I constantly have to watch what I say, which as you know I have a problem with just saying anything that pops into my head.” I explained.

“Oh yes we do.” She smiled.

Of course she did. There was even an internet meme surround me saying stupidly obvious things in random situations. My most loathed one was a picture of me in the Tardis from Doctor Who, with a caption bubble that read ‘this thing looks smaller on the outside’. It was a terrible joke and one that had been so overused on the show. I’d been so excited to discover I was an internet meme, imagine my disappointment when I discovered what it was about. I’d hoped it would be something cool like Jen Silva’s ‘I don’t know what I’m doing here’ or Jennifer Lawrence’s ‘I volunteer’ meme. Instead I was the girl who had word vomit and just stated stupidly obvious things. So annoying… Sometimes the internet was so unfair.

“Is there any other time you get nervous?” she asked curiously.

“Yeah, the first day’s on set are always a bit nerve racking.” I said, “I mean you’re just meeting everyone, you want to make a good impression, and you’re trying to get to know these people you’re going to be working with; try and find their acting rhythms and what they need from a scene partner.” I explained as I thought back to my first day on the set of Agamemnon.

…

Not a lot of people know how much preparation goes into filming a single scene. Of course the set has to be made and dressed with props, lighting has to be rigged to not only light the set but the actors well, sound has to be tested so nothing squeaks or creaks when it shouldn't. And that was all before the actors even got on set. Most assumed that we just got into costume and arrived there but that was not the case; before we even set foot in costume, usually the day before filming, we had to rehearse. All the actors needed for the scene were called to set to rehearse. Where the actors would stand, what movements they would do, when they would speak and what emotions were infused into a scene.

My first day on set would be spent rehearsing a scene with the entire cast in one of the largest sets I had ever seen, that of the Troy Palace throne room.

The room was split into two levels; the throne was raised onto a long podium with a series of steps leading up to it. It was situated towards the back of the room, a walk way went up the middle of the room flanked either side by large, old looking columns. All of the room looked like it was made out of solid stone and rock, but upon tapping one of the pillars I could hear that it was in fact hollow. Though the amount of work that had obviously gone into the fake tiles on the floor was brilliant, they looked so real!

"Alright Russ, I want you sitting on the throne." called Ridley as he directed us to our places.

"Right" he said as he got up and sat on the large stone looking seat, which was really made out of plastic painted foam.

"On your right I want Rich, on your left Nick." staring at a piece of paper he had that obviously held his blueprint for the scene, "Jen you stand next to Nick, Ophelia your by Richard....and that's you guys." he said, seeming satisfied as we took our places. An assistant direction immediately marked our places with pieces of bright pink tape so that we would know where to stand tomorrow.

"James, Oscar, I want you standing down here on the lower level in front of them but make sure you stand sort of either side of the throne so Russ can be seen between the two of you..." said Ridley as he finished setting the scene.

"Are you going to be wearing shoes like that every day?" asked Richard curiously as I came to stand beside him.

I looked down at my feet, they were clad in bright pink heels, matched with grey jeans and a white shirt, "Yes" I said simply, "My collection of brightly colored shoes is endless." I informed him, though he smiled as if I was joking, I was actually being quite serious.

"Ok you guys up there," called Ridley to us as we stood on the raised podium by the throne, " I want you all to be on high alert. Like you’re ready to jump into action at any moment, Rich to defend Russ and Nick to defend Jen." he directed, " Jen I want you to be looking like you want to run at any moment. Sophie I need you to be like a wild animal you know, constantly searching for something that’s about to go wrong." he instructed.

I nodded in understanding.

"Russ and Oscar you two are the only calm ones. Russ has the authority here but Oscar you’re kind of quietly confident of the outcome here. James I want you to be on edge, like seeing Helena has the rage boiled up inside you that’s just going to explode." said Ridley he then went to the back of the room and held his fingers up, squinting through them to see how to position the camera in order to get the shot he wanted, "Right here's my first shot. Bam! Alright begin the scene guys, run through it while I position some shots."

The scene we were rehearsing for was just after the Greeks had arrived in Troy and Agamemnon and Menelaus had come to discuss their terms with Priam, which was to submit to the Greek rule and return Helena back to them. Priam of course refuses despite Cassandra's warning that it will be the end of Troy and Hector's pleading for him to avoid a war.

Russell and Oscar began to say their lines with halfhearted acting that was often employed in rehearsals like this. Even so, my attention was automatically drawn to Oscar.

There was something so hypnotic about his acting, perhaps it was the way he did it with apparent ease. There was no preparation needed for him to become Agamemnon, he could just call that character right to him.

I on the other hand was not so lucky, I'd spent the entire drive to set riling myself up so I could get a similar frantic feeling someone had when they had too much sugar so that I could accurately portray Cassandra's scattered mind. I thought it was working well for me, it helped to make my movements fidgety and my eyes easily bounced all over the room like Ridley wanted.

But upon seeing Oscar's performance, I knew I would have to step up my game, I was beginning to get the feeling that Oscar didn't like me.

He had not done anything particularly mean to me or anything, but I just felt that he found me annoying. This morning when we had all been chatting, I had asked Oscar if he was nervous about tomorrow, just to make conversation.

"No." had been his curt reply. He didn't even look down at me when he said it.

"Excited then?" I probed, once again trying to make conversation.

"No." he replied again before he walked off. 

Ignoring me at the table read was one thing. It was more of an acting politeness than general manners. But not even acknowledging someone when they spoke to you was downright rude, not just from one actor to another but from one human being to another.

Suddenly Oscar turned to look at me for what felt like the first time. He stared at me expectantly as if I was supposed to do something and was not doing it fast enough for him.

I was so surprised by his sudden attention to me that I froze.

"Ophelia, that's your line!" called Ridley.  

“Oh." I said in realization, "Sorry."

I watched as Oscar rolled his eyes and turned his attention back to Russell.

I mentally kicked myself at coming off as so incompetent before I said my line, focusing all my attention on giving a good performance.

"Good." praised Ridley.

Well that was comforting at least he thought I was doing well. Oscar on the other hand looked bored and was looking anywhere in the room but at me.

"Nick I want you to be expecting the worst, anything that is said you’re taking it in the worst possible way. You see no possible good outcome." said Ridley.

We continued on for the rest of the day rehearsing the scene. I gave everything Ridley said my full attention, not wanting to be caught out again. I didn't want to embarrass myself in front of Oscar again, which I seemed to be doing a lot of.

After a full day of rehearsal, it was decided that we would all go out to dinner.

"Ophelia, you coming?" asked Jennifer curiously.

"Sure, I just have to call my mum, ask if its ok." I told her.

Oscar scoffed.

I snapped my head around to glare at him; did he find the fact that I had to ask my mother's permission to go out funny? Although I was an actress, able to attend work and various events by myself, if I was going to be out late I still needed to ask her if it was alright. She was still my Mother. Even though I had no doubt that she would let me go out, it was still polite to ask.

Ignoring the anger that had bubbled up inside me at Oscar's condescending glare, I quickly dialed my Mother's number, acutely aware that everyone was listening to see if I could come, "Hey mum, is it alright if I get dinner with the cast tonight?" I asked.

"Sure darling, but don’t be out too late. You've got an early start tomorrow" she advised.

"Yep. I'll be home by nine thirty at the latest." I advised.

Movement from the corner of my eye caught my attention and I could see Oscar was shaking his head.

Was I being paranoid or was he going out of his way to make me feel unwelcome?

I ignored him and said goodbye to my Mother. Jennifer immediately linked her arm through mine, "Come on, you can ride with me." she said.

A restaurant was agreed upon and everyone left to go to their various cars. I piled into Jen's car, once she was inside she turned to me, "What's up with you and Oscar?" she asked.

"So it's not just me. You see it too?" I demanded as my fears were confirmed.

"He seems to really not like you. What did you do?" she asked.

"I have no idea." I marveled, "Is he like that to you?" I asked, wondering if his harsh treatment was restricted to me or if he was like that with everyone.

"No, he's completely fine with me." she said as she started up the car and pulled out of the studio parking lot, "He's actually really nice."

“Wonder what I did to deserve such special treatment." I grumbled.

"It’s weird." Jen agreed, "Maybe he'll loosen up a little bit tonight. I mean he's probably just stressed out being the lead in the movie and all." she reasoned.

"Yeah." I agreed, I hoped that was all it was.

We arrived at the restaurant shortly after everyone else, for some reason, Jennifer had chosen Nandos.

"I've been craving their chips all day!" she informed me as we walked inside.

I wasn't a fan of spicy food, but I didn't mind Nandos as their food was optionally spicy, so I could order what everyone else did but just request the non-spicy version.

Going to the counter, Jen and I ordered before we went to the back booth where everyone was sitting.

"I swear I've been dreaming about Nandos." said Jen as she sat down.

"You know I've never been." said Richard conversationally.

"What? No way!" I marveled as I sat down next to Jennifer, I spied Oscar in the far corner, talking with James quietly.

I watched them curiously, it seemed to be a perfectly nice and normal conversation, though I could not hear what they were saying, due to the loud babble of the other tables, but their conversation seemed perfectly pleasant. Why couldn't he talk that way with me?

I was being paranoid. Jennifer was right, he was probably just stressed about the movie and now that we were in a more relaxed environment away from any set drama he was sure to loosen up.

Everyone sat chatting pleasantly at Nandos as we ate our food. I was a little quieter than I usually would have been as I didn't want to open myself up to ridicule from Oscar again. Normally I enjoyed times like these, where the cast would go out and bond together, getting to know their colleagues that they would be seeing for the next seven months. Or only four months in my case. The first two would all be filmed on sets in LA before we would be heading to Croatia to film outdoor scenes. During that time, I would get a six week break where I would be filming another movie in LA, before I went and filmed for two months in Europe.

The night progressed on from Nandos as Russell and Richard decided they wanted to go to a dart bar. James and Nick bailed and decided to head back home.

The Dart Bar was not what I expected. Instead of normal pin darts, we were handed white plastic ones with a little star on the tip. We were then shown to a board with thousands of tiny star holes in it that lit up whenever a dart was pinned into the board before flashing a picture of you mid throw. It was quite cool in my opinion.

The first time I stepped up to throw a dart; it didn’t even hit the board. The second time it landed on the outer edge of the board… in the lane next to us.

“Sorry!” I called as I rushed over and pulled my dart out of their board, “I’m so sorry about that.” I apologized.

It turned out that the group next to us were fans of the X-Men series, “I love the show!” gushed one girl, “Your Jean Gray is flawless!”

“Thank you.” I smiled; it was my favorite compliment for me to hear that people liked the show and that it was so popular. It made sense, seeing as the show was a spin-off of a major movie franchise, but the fact that fans were so embracing and genuinely loving of my portray of Jean Gray was just so fantastic. It made me feel that all the hard work I put into the character was not done in vain.

“You look so hot in your X-Men uniform.” Said one of the guys.

“Thank you.” I blushed.

Hearing I looked hot in a leather suite was probably my second favorite compliment.

I stood talking to them for a moment as they snapped photos with me before I headed back over to the group.

“Oh good, now we can play.” Said Oscar, rolling his eyes as he took a sip of his drink.

“Sorry.” I apologized, “I ran into some fans over there.” I said gesturing to behind me.

“Oh its totally fine.” Said Jennifer dismissively.

It certainly didn’t seem fine to Oscar.

Stepping over to the line I threw my dart once more and it landed on the edge of our board. I smiled in triumphant as I headed back to the table and Rich stepped up to take his shot.

“Excuse me?” asked the girl from before, “Are you Jennifer Lawrence?” she asked timidly.

“Yes, I am!” she smiled happily.

I sat down at our table just as Russ excused himself to go to the bathroom. I turned to look at Oscar, waiting for him to start some conversation but he simply stared at his beer.

Unable to take the silence I spoke, “This is really fun. I mean I suck but I’m having fun.” I smiled.

“Yeah, whatever.” He said simply.

I wasn’t sure why, but I snapped. I had been nothing but nice to him and he had been nothing but rude and I was sick of it.

“Alright, what is your problem?” I demanded.

“I don’t have a problem.” He said simply.

“You sure? Because you’ve been incredibly rude to me ever since we met. So have a done something to piss you off?” I demanded.

“Yes actually.” He fired back.

“Great. Tell me.” I said, waiting for whatever stupid excuse he could come up with for being so rude to me.

He turned to face me, staring me directly in the eyes as he spoke, “This movie is a big opportunity for me. And I don’t think your cut out for it. I think your too immature to be in a movie like this and I don’t want to have to work twice as hard just to get a performance out of you that I can work with that I could easily get from someone else.” He said simply.

“Wow.” I marveled, “I’m immature? Really?” I challenged.

He stared at me determinedly, not ashamed by his words.

“Let’s examine that claim for a moment. When you were my age you had been expelled from school. No job prospects, no future. While as I have a full time job, have finished university and have enough money saved that I could live comfortably for the next twenty years. Now tell me who is immature?” I demanded angrily.

“What are you my stalker?” he asked sarcastically. 

“No, I used to be an admirer actually.” I said flatly, “Don’t worry, my opinion of you has severely changed.” I assured him.

He stared at me, unimpressed.

“I am a good actress. And like it or not I’m in this film with you. So stop giving me shit and let me do my job.” I said firmly.

He blinked several times as if he couldn’t quite believe what he’d heard.

I turned away from him and watched as Richard took his turn at the dart board, I resisted the urge to pout and instead stared ahead of me determinedly.

“Sorry.” Oscar muttered.

I glanced at him out of the corner of my eye; he was looking down at his beer in what could have been shame. It also could have been condescension. I wasn’t sure. Either way I desperately wanted to say ‘apology not accepted’ but I felt that would have hampered my point that I was mature. So I simply said nothing and went back to watching the dart board. 

“Hey Oscar, you’re up!” said Richard as he came back to the booth, he stared between the two of us, obviously sensing something was wrong, “Everything ok?” he asked.

“Everything is fine.” I said coolly.

“Yeah.” Said Oscar as he downed the rest of his beer and placed his glass down on the table with an audible rattle before he walked over to the board.

Richard raised his eyebrows to me curiously.

I rolled my eyes in reassurance; still unable to speak I was so furious.


	4. Chapter 4

A new addition to the Oscar’s this year was a rotating pedestal where people took turns standing on a rotating platform that showed the outfit from all sides while the paparazzi snapped pictures and the outfit was filmed.

As I stepped up onto the pedestal I lifted my dress slightly, flashing the pair of heels I was wearing.

“Oh Ophelia you look so good.” Said the camera man by the pedestal as he pointed his camera at me.

I smiled as I placed my hand on my hip and let the paparazzi film and snap pictures to their hearts content as the platform rotated.

Given the fact that it had taken me over a month and various votes between my family and friends for me to choose just a dress, I hoped I looked good. Let alone everything else, the make-up, jewelry and hair style. The only thing I had been settled on about my outfit was that I would be wearing my shoe pendant.

At the thought of it I touched it absently, thinking of Oscar; would things always be like this between us? Stolen glances and quick conversations? It seemed they had been that way even before our feelings got complicated.

...

For the rest of my time on the Agamemnon set, things between Oscar and I were strange. He had obviously taken my words to heart and no longer made me feel like an idiot or made derogatory comments about me. He was perfectly polite in my presence. Which brought with it a whole new set of problems.

He wasn't mean to me, but he was by no measure nice. He was formal and polite, like a detached employee speaking to a customer only when they were required to, while they longed to be on their lunch break.

I watched how he interacted with the other people on set, to see if he treated all his co-stars the way he treated me. He did not.

Although he took his work seriously, he obviously liked to joke and laugh with his friends, he seemed easy going and friendly. He was always up for talking about the script and delving into the real mechanics of acting (with everyone except me) and boy did he know his stuff. Listening to him talk about acting filled me with a whole new sense of passion for my craft and taught me so much about all the leg work an actor should do before they even got to a scene. He spoke about breaking down a scene, picking out sentences and words that would cause the character to change emotions. All of these things were done to best prepare you for the scene when it came time to shoot.

Watching him act was a far better lesson than what I could have ever gained from going to an acting school. I marveled over how he was able to take the bare skeleton of what the character was on the page and build them into a fully fleshed human being. The emotion’s he was able to bring forward made me examine my own performance critically and helped push me to give a better performance.

I would never admit it, but I tried to emulate him. I used little tricks to get a performance I felt was of a similar caliber of his. I began to use little traits such as always biting my tongue in a scene where I was required to barely speak, making it look as if there was always something I wanted to say, that was on the tip of my tongue but I had to hold it back or limiting the amount of times that I blinked when I was doing close ups to give my character an eerily sense of being able to see through someone. I also took from what Ridley said about Cassandra being a wild animal trapped in a cage and I made myself fidget; if I wasn't scratching something or moving in some way then I had my eyes dart around the room as if I was looking for danger or a way out.

As a result I was giving some of the best performances of my career, which was good because I was determined to prove Oscar wrong. I was determined to prove that not only was I the right actress for the job, but that I was the best actress for the job. That no one could have done it better than me. Though I knew I would not achieve that, if I came close I would be happy.

I also began to watch Oscar's interactions with others as I saw two different sides of him; the emotionless and polite person he was to me and the charming guy he was to everyone else.

I listened to him and Russell chat about music for a solid hour, people had been begging Oscar to release an album ever since he had performed a series of songs in the movie 'Inside Llewyn Davis' and he had been recording songs for an album on the weekends when he was not filming for Agamemnon. Though he had been offered various lucrative deals for his music he had decided to go old school and create an album and go out and perform the songs in small intimate gigs, where he would sell the album. It made me respect him because he was not creating an album for the money, he was creating it because he wanted to share his music with the masses and he had a very specific idea of how he wanted to do it.

There was something so truthful in the way Oscar performed, he really wasn't there to do a job like a lot of us began to when we had to film scenes that were boring and the day's were long. He was there because he had a talented that he wanted to share and that translated to everything he did. Whether it was joking with Jennifer or discussing literature with James, he was truthful.

I admired him from a far and I found myself becoming besotted by the person I observed. It was like watching a dangerous predator out in the wild, seeing how majestic and calm it was, you could almost fool yourself into thinking that if you were to approach it, that you could stroke it with no consequences. But I knew I could not. The moment I approached him, Oscar turned into a vicious predator that was more likely to eat me before I could so much as get a word out.

Strangely enough I felt as if I was being watched on the set more often not. And I felt that it was Oscar who was watching me. Whenever I was talking to someone or involved in a scene of some sort I felt a critical gaze on me, watching everything I did. But whenever I would look up, Oscar's eyes were elsewhere. I knew he was watching me to see me slip up. He wanted me to fail. He wanted to make me uncomfortable but I would never give him the satisfaction of knowing he got to me. It just fueled me to throw myself into every scene and give the best performance I could.

My feelings towards Oscar were extremely confusing until one night when we were all hanging out in Jen’s trailer in between takes.

“Hey Ophelia,” called Nick, “Come and see a magic trick.”

Sighing I got up from the couch and walked into the kitchen area of Jen’s trailer. 

“What?” I asked.

“Hold this.” He said, handing me a broom.

“Ok,” I said as I took the broom, frowning in confusion as everyone in the room joined us in the kitchen.

“Place it under the bowl.” He said as he held a bowl up to the ceiling.

“Ok…” I said as I placed the broom handle under the bowl.

“Press it up there so you hold the bowl up to the ceiling.” He instructed, still holding the bowl firmly in place.

“Alright.” I said as I pressed the handle of the broom firmly up towards the roof, trapping the bowl between the ceiling and the broom handle.

Nick took his hands away from the bowl and stood smiling.

“Now what?” I asked curiously, wondering what the magic trick was supposed to be.

“Now… stand there until you get tired and water falls on you.” he smiled.

My face fell, “What?”

A chuckle went through the group as I realized they were all here to witness the practical joke Nick was playing on me.

“Jen?” I asked turning to look at her, how had she allowed this to happen?

She simply giggled in response.

I looked over at Richard and James, my other two close friends on the set, they stood laughing. It was then I spotted Russell holding his phone up, recording the entire thing.

I quickly thought through my predicament… if I could release the broom and catch the water close to the ceiling then I wouldn’t get wet…

Steeling myself, I dropped the broom and held my hands out. The bowl fell into my waiting hands, not a drop of water spilling on me. Making a snap decision I then threw the bowl towards Nick, splashing the water all over him. 

Everyone in the room burst out laughing as Nick stood in absolute shock, soaking wet. I laughed loudly as I watched him, his joke had backfired so badly and it had all been on tape.

It was then I heard something I’d never heard before, turning to look back in the lounge room I saw Oscar chuckling lightly at what had just occurred. He then turned to look at me, still smiling and chuckling. I smiled back, hoping in vain that I was finally breaking through whatever wall he had put up between us.

The smile slowly slipped from his face as he looked at me, a serious note creeping into his eyes.  Something passed between us, something that caused knots to form in my stomach and for me to feel slightly out of breath. But before I could linger on what the feeling was too much, he looked away, his face impassive once more.

I looked away, trying to examine the strange feeling that had coursed through me in that moment. I realized then that I had developed real feelings for Oscar. One’s that weren’t just born out of admiration for his talent, but an actual liking of him.

I tried to explain the way I felt about Oscar to Taylor when we were having dinner one time.

Taylor Swift and I had been introduced to one another through our mutual friend Hailee Steinfeld at an awards show. We had hit it off instantly when I complimented her dress and she complimented my shoes.

Despite having various models in the 'Tay Squad' it was me who was sent pictures of outfits and various articles of clothing to give my opinion on. She had taken to calling me 'Shubert' a nick name for 'Shoe Expert' and I had grown quite close with her. She was the one I turned to for advice on navigating the complex machine that was Hollywood. But lately I had also began to turn to her for romantic advice.

"So let me get this straight, you like a guy who has been nothing but rude to you ever since you met?" she asked as she cut up pieces of her Omelet into tiny bite sized portions.

"He's not rude. He's...ambivalent." I finally settled on.

“Well that makes it better.” She said sarcastically.

"I don't like the person that he is to me. I like the person that he is with everyone else. They are two different people." I explained, "There is just something about him Taylor, I can't put my finger on it. HIs talent is absolutely amazing and I of course find that attractive but not only that, he is a good person."

"To everyone else. But to you he's not." she observed.

"Yeah." I agreed.

"You know how messed up that is right?" she asked.

"Well you are the Queen of messed up relationships." I smiled as I took a sip of my drink.

"Hey I have made a career out of bad relationships." she replied, "and besides, you don't want to go getting involved with an older man. I've done it and all it does is lead to trouble. They spin you about and mess you up. They're manipulative." she said pointedly.

I knew who she was talking about; John Mayer and Jake Gyllanhal. Even now when Taylor spoke about them she had a sort of malice to her voice at how thoroughly she had been used by them.

"Oh please as if I would get involved with him. This admiration is completely one sided." I said pointedly, rolling my eyes, "the guy thinks I'm an immature child. He told me so himself."

"Dick." she commented as she took a sip of her drink.

"Tell me about it." I agreed, "How is your love life these days?" I asked curiously.

"At the moment I am just happy being single. I'm dating all of my friends. I go out for lunch with them, I get snuggles from them, I go to them with my problems, who needs a boyfriend?" she said.

"That's great Tay." I smiled, genuinely happy for her.

Her love life had been so highly publicized in the tabloids that it was nice that she was finally taking a break and just enjoying being by herself.

"Which brings me to a very important topic." she began, "What are you doing in April?" she asked.

"Filming the last season of X-Men. Why?" I asked curiously.

"Do you want to be in my music video?"  she asked.

"Sure!" I smiled, "What's it about?" I asked curiously, wondering what part she wanted me to play.

"I'm doing like a Sin City, action video. My famous friends are all playing  parts of these bad-asses teaching my character fighting styles to face this epic villain." she explained.

"That sounds awesome! You want me to play the villain?" I asked curiously.

"No, Sel is the villain. I want you to play one of the girls teaching me something." she explained.

I frowned in confusion, while Taylor and I were friends I was by no means one of her closest friends. When they tabloids talked about her 'Sqaud' it included the likes of Selena Gomez and Gigi Hadid, not me. I knew that and I had no problem with that.

There were a lot of rumors about the 'Tay Squad' that Taylor dictated what everyone wore and who they dated. They only had to say good things about her in the press and that they had to support her unconditionally. That she chose the members on the Squad because of what they could do for her image, not out of genuine liking of any of its members. It was all lies of course. The group was genuinely girls who all liked to hang out with each other and who had not only the common friend of Taylor but each other. The only difference between the Squad and a group of friends at High School was that everyone in the Squad was famous. If they weren’t it would have hardly been news worthy. 

"You said only your Squad was going to be in the video." I frowned.

"Which brings me to my second question, you want to join the Tay Squad?" she asked, the joke clearly evident in her voice at referring to girls that she just thought of as friends as her ‘Sqaud’, "I mean like officially? You’ve already been part of it for a while but the girls were saying we should make it official." 

"Oh my god!" I laughed, "I'm speechless! Is this what it feels like to win an Oscar?" I joked.

"Please. They give those to anybody. The Squad is far more prestigious." she said solemnly.

I laughed, "On one condition," I said seriously, "You have to plan my Eighteenth Birthday party." I bargained.

She blinked in shock, "Seriously?"

"I know it’s only September now. But I really want it to be a good night. Not just where I get drunk but where I get to have fun." I shrugged.

"Deal."

We clinked our glasses together happily.

"So tell me more about this video. Sounds epic." I commented.

"Well we are all playing these badass chicks and you get to pick your own hero name." she explained; "I'm Catastrophe." she smiled.

"I could be Shubert?" I suggested.

"That's too much of an inside joke." she said, "If you were a superhero I think you'd be something like Unbreakable Doll or something." she mused.

"Unbreakable doll?" I quizzed. 

"Have you seen your skin? You look like a porcelain doll." she explained.

I laughed, it was true I had gotten offers from many companies to be the face of their brilliant and amazing skin cream but I had turned them all down. I didn't use any of their creams to wash my skin and achieve the look I did, so I wasn't about to endorse their product and claim that it was the reason I had beautiful skin when it wasn’t.

The only thing I did was clean my face with a baby-wipe every morning. I was too lazy to do anything else. But having red hair, I was also deathly pale so people naturally compared my skin to that of a pale porcelain doll.

"When are we filming this masterpiece?" I asked curiously.

"Second week of April." she explained.

I nodded, "I have to take a day off filming X-Men." I explained.

"Shooting the vid over four days so you should be good." she shrugged.

"This is so cool!" I smiled.

"Now, back to this Oscar thing." she said formally, "You are a hot seventeen year old. There is not a single guy in the world who doesn't want you in some capacity. Even gay guys would want your wardrobe." she said pointedly.

"I'm pretty sure Oscar isn't gay."

"Then he probably has the hots for you but is fighting against it because your seventeen and jailbait." she explained.

I stared at her incredulously, "That is the stupidest thing I have ever heard." I said dismissively.

"Suit yourself. But that is what I think is going on."

"You’re delusional." I told her firmly.

"Whatever." she said, though there was something very knowing in her smile.


	5. Chapter 5

I felt like some sort of Barbie Doll as I stood on the pedestal and rotated around, the camera man filming me from all angels and the paparazzi snapping pictures in wildly quick succession. I couldn’t but marvel at how far my career had come. I’d gone from performing in school plays, to acting on an international television show, to acting in Indie films to acting in blockbusters.

…

Though there wasn't much of a difference in the quality of film, but going from performing on a blockbuster film to an indie film was astronomical. Especially on a film like ‘The Room’.  There were no vast palace sets but simply one set of a dingy old room that was the entire world to the characters that inhabited it.

On Agamemnon there had always been another take to get the scene right, on The Room I immediately got the feeling like I was back in High School and performing in theatre, that I had to do it right the first time as if there was no second time. It had to be right the first time and every time.

I only had one day to myself where I wasn't filming Agamemnon before I was on the set of The Room. It was based on the best-selling novel about a girl who had been kidnapped and was kept in a single room by her kidnapper. The story was from the perspective of the child she'd had with her captor.

If I had been nervous on my first day of Agamemnon, that was nothing compared to how I felt on my first day on The Room. Art Parkinson, from Game of Thrones, was playing my son and I was absolutely flummoxed about how to play the relationship. I didn't have any younger siblings of whom I had a protective mother-like instinct over. In fact the thought of children was the furthest thing from my mind, so I had nothing to go on! So I asked my mother.

"Imagine spending nine months creating something, like a chair, every day you get up and you start carving this chair and when you aren't carving it, you’re thinking about it. You want nothing more than to see this chair be seated at a dining table but you don't want anyone to sit on it because what if they break it? You’ll have to be the one that puts it back together and you can't bear the thought of someone messing up your chair because you have spent so much work on it. You’ve been there from the moment the chair was just a piece of wood. Its hopes and dreams of being part of a dining room set become your hopes and dreams because you want nothing more than to see that chair happy. You never realized something could mean so much to you as that chair does and you are constantly worried that someone is going to break that chair that you want to wrap it in bubble wrap and never let it out of your sight! But ultimately you have to, even though it makes you very upset you just want to see that chair happy." she explained.

I had no response to her strange explanation. But I was able to read between the lines. So I had wrapped my arms around her and told her that I loved her.

I knew I wanted the relationship between my character and her son to be a strong one like the one my mother had described. So I reached out to Art and began emailing him in order to get to know him, which was really the basis of any relationship. Despite only being twelve, Art was a surprisingly smart and all around great kid. He was really more than happy to correspond with me while he was away in Australia filming San Andres. He told me about his life on set, his hopes and dreams and I did the same. I even recommended places for him to go in Australia on his days off, which he surprisingly did, gushing about how much fun he’d had in his emails.

On one of my spare weekends, when he was back in America, I took him ice skating. While I didn't have the Motherly concern of him hurting himself, I did have the concern of what his mother might do to me if I were to bring him back in anything less than the condition she had given him to me in.

So going into filming, Art and I had a good understanding of one another and the relationship we wanted to portray as a Mother and Son who had no one else in the world. And me as a Mother who would sacrifice the only person she had so that he could have a life, which was basically what the whole second act of the story was about, my characters elaborate plan to get her son to escape.

My relationship with my only other co-star, the man playing my captor, Chris Pine was a little different.

Prior to filming, I had only met him twice. The first had been in my audition for the character. The second time had been at our script read through, which I had done on one of my days off from filming Agamemnon. The role was something quite different for Chris; not only did he have to play this cold and calculating captor, he also had to play this charming and charismatic man that was incredibly manipulative. It was amazing to see him switch between one side of the character to another.

I'd wanted to get to know him in a similar way that I had gotten to know Art, but our director Kathryn Bigelow, from 'The Hurt Locker' fame, had said she wanted our interaction to be very minimal prior to filming. She wanted there to be a sense of the unknown between us. Like an invisible wall that would come down as we filmed and got to know one another on set in front of the cameras.

I was anxious about my first day of filming because I would finally get to know Chris! But also because I wanted to give a good performance as this was my first leading role and I wanted to do well.

It was strange to see that my work on Agamemnon had really help forge me into a better actor as I made the decision even prior to filming that I would dig my fingers into my hand to make it seem as if my character was constantly in pain and that I would never look at Chris in the eye. I would look at his ear or a spot on the wall close to his head, never at him directly as I was supposed to be frightened of him. My determination to prove Oscar wrong had made me a better actor in how I approached my script and character.

The first shot of the movie was me shutting Art into a closest as Chris stepped through the door of the room, casting an ominous shadow over us before he grabbed me.

Upon seeing Chris again, he immediately pulled me into a hug, I was startled by his familiarity and affection as he pulled back to look at me, "Before we do anything I just want to apologize for how mean I am going to have to be to you.” he said.

I laughed, "I apologize for how frightened I'm going to have to be of you." I replied.

Perhaps it was because on Agamemnon I had grown so used to Oscar's detachment of me that it came as quite a surprise for Chris to be so affectionate and open with me. It was like finally having a beautiful home cooked meal after living on cold take-out for three months.

There was no rehearsal on The Room of what we would do, Kathryn simply explained what she wanted us to do, how she was going to frame it and then we were sent to do it.

We did maybe four or five takes of me shutting Art in the wardrobe and Chris stepping in and yanking me off the ground. Then Art was sent to go do schooling and we filmed Chris grabbing me by the shoulders and shaking me violently before he threw me down onto the bed. It was quite a violent scene to film on my first day but I felt that Kathryn was trying to set the tone of the film that it was the story of the girl who had been kidnapped and repeatedly raped and was now trying to save her child, fathered by a man she considered a Monster.

"Really get into it Chris, grip her tightly and shake her!" called Kathryn from the director’s chair, "Ophelia I really want to see your head snap back and forth."

Chris turned to look at me reluctantly, "I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry!" he chanted before he schooled his features into a frightening mask and shook me violently and threw me down onto the bed again.

"Yes! Excellent!" called Kathryn.

Chris immediately pulled me in for a hug, helping me up off the bed kindly.

That became a certain rhythm between us, before every violent scene between us Chris would profusely apologize before he would get into character and go at it. He always hugged me afterwards, as if his apology at the start had not been enough. Again and again I told him that it was fine, that the rougher he was with me the more it helped me in my performance and my reactions but he still seemed to feel terrible.

It was kind of adorable that he was such a stand-up guy that he didn't even like being rough with a girl when it was completely safe and no malice behind it. It was practically in his job description and required of him but you could see he still felt horrible.

I threw myself into those scenes, screaming and crying and attempting to fight him off. By the end of the week I was covered in bruises and absolutely exhausted.

That was all I really learnt about him as Kathryn still didn't want us to talk to one another so that we could still achieve that element of surprise and unknown in our violent scenes together. I was glad we were getting all of those out of the way first so that the rest of the shooting schedule would be a lot calmer and more the aftermath of those violent scenes.

Friday was the last of the violent scenes. It was a scene where Chris was attacking me again and Art stepped in to try and stop him. It was a trying scene on all of us as there was a lot of yelling and crying and stunt work, Chris had to pretend to hit Art in just the right way and I had to struggle against him in such a way that looked like I desperately wanted to get to my child but not so much that I overpowered Chris. It was exhausting and I was glad when it was over. 

"Alright check the gate, and that should be it for today." called Kathryn when our first week was up.

I high fived Art as we went over to our chairs, waiting for the ok that we were done for the day.

"Hey Ophelia." called Chris as he came over to me.

"Mr. Pine." I greeted.

"What are you doing this weekend?" he asked curiously.

"Catching up on some well needed sleep." I said honestly.

"Are you open to suggestions?" he asked, raising an eyebrow curiously. 

"Maybe. Depends what they are." I allowed.

"Well I just checked with Kathryn and we're allowed to talk to each other now." he explained, an excited glint coming into his beautiful blue eyes.

"Yay!" I laughed.

"So I was wondering if you wanted to grab dinner?" he asked.

I blinked in shock, "I'd love that." I smiled, "Um, not tomorrow I'll probably still be recovering but Sunday?" I suggested.

"Great. It's a date. I'll text you the details." he said before he walked off.

I blinked in shock, had he just said date? Did Chris Pine just ask me out on a date?

As quickly as the idea had come unbidden to my mind, I dismissed it. Of course not. Chris was thirty-four, there was no way he had any interest in me. I was a seventeen year old girl and he was the kind of guy that had dated Supermodels. And it was really no wonder with him being such a great guy and having eyes the color of the sky on a cloudless day...

Yet the thought was still there, Taylor’s words from before echoing in my mind. Unsure, I called my friend Jenifer Silva, she had dated older men and she would be able to tell me if this was a date or not.

"So what do you think?" I asked as laid in my bed, my phone pressed to my ear as I finished explaining to her the situation.

Despite both being a part of the Tay Squad, Jen and I had in fact met when I was thirteen and had attended my first ever Comic-Con.

I had been so nervous and overwhelmed with it all. But Jen had been cool as a cucumber, being a Comic-Con veteran, she had showed me the ropes, how to handle the masses and the press interviews. On our second day at the event she had dressed as a Power Ranger, her identity completely obscured, she’d also brought me a Power Ranger costume. With our faces hidden the two of us had walked around Comic-Con like just another couple of fans. Going to the panels we wanted and hanging out with other fans. If anyone had any idea of who we really were we would never have been able to move about so freely. So we had made it an annual thing where the two of us would do our interviews on one day then the next day, dress -up in costumes that hid our identities and walk around Comic-Con enjoying the experience with everyone else.

"Hmmm, this is a tough one." said Jen after I finished talking.

I let her think for a moment.

"On one hand, he could just want to talk about the movie with you. Or hang out as friends, he’s a friendly guy. On the other hand he is taking you out to dinner so it could be a date." she mused. 

"I know." I agreed, "I have no idea which one it is."

"What restaurant is he taking you to?" she asked curiously.

"Ill Umbrello."I replied.

“Hmm. That’s a good restaurant, so he could be trying to impress you, as in a date. But I’ve also had business meetings there… " she observed.

"So we're back at square one." I sighed.

"You know I could just call Chris and ask him?" she said pointedly, “According to the tabloids, we’re supposed to be having a baby together.”

"No!" I shouted frightfully, if she called him, Chris would know I had talked to her and he would think that I thought it was a date, which it wasn't. Or it could be. I still had no idea.

"Well I think you should be prepared either way. I mean, would you like it to be a date?” She asked curiously.

"What do you mean?"

"Well, are you attracted to Chris?" she asked curiously.

I rolled my eyes, "I think every woman in the world is attracted to Chris Pine, Jen." I said, "But I don't know, I mean, he is a great guy and we get along, but I don't know if I could see us dating. Isn't he too old for me?"

"Age is just a number, Shubert." she said, using my nickname. “Take it from me.”

"And prison’s just a room. Ok, this is fun, you go!" I joked.

She laughed, "You'd be surprised about how accepting people in Hollywood are of age gaps between couples. I mean, look at me and Harry, we were called an ‘It Couple’." She said pointedly. 

"That's like six years difference, not seventeen." I said pointedly.

"What about me and David?" she said , “That was twenty-five years”.

"Yes, because that worked out so well." I said sarcastically.

"Touché." she said, "I think you need to figure out how you feel about Chris before we discuss if this is a date. Would you mind if it was a date?" she asked.

"Well... No." I qualified.

"Really? I thought you were into that Oscar guy from Agamemnon?" she asked curiously.

"Who told you that?"

"Taylor."

"The guy doesn't even acknowledge my presence." I replied.

"Sadly that doesn’t mean that you don’t like him," she said pointedly.

I sighed, "Yeah, I like him. But I'm reluctant to admit that because it’s completely stupid. The guy obviously doesn't like me. He has done nothing to nurture any good feelings between us-" I began but she interrupted me. 

"I’d be more concerned if he was doing something to hit on you..." she said.

“What do you mean?”

“You said it yourself, you’re seventeen. I’ve walked down this road before, kid. It’s a dangerous one. But if he’s not investing at least it means he’s not a predator.” She explained.

I sat in stunned silence. I never thought of any guy liking me in a romantic way was a predator. But I guess in the eye of the law, that could be what it appeared as. 

“And yet, despite all that, you like him anyway.” She finished.

"Which is absolutely ridiculous." I commented.

"The greatest love stories have begun on less." she said simply.

"You are of no help." I sighed.

She laughed, "Ok, so if you don't mind the fact that this thing with Chris could be a date I say you dress like it’s a date but treat it as a meeting between co-stars and adjust your approach as the night goes." she suggested. 

I thought through her words, "That's actually not a bad idea."

"Why do you sound so surprised?" she asked, "I'm full of ideas! Remember the time we made omelets in your pancake maker? They were perfect!" she defended.

"I also remember the time you brought a baby pool and filled it with Jelly." I said pointedly.

"Oh come on!" she complained, "That was fun and you know it. And it tasted delicious." she defended.

"Yes, I remember. The ant infestation you got afterwards was so fun." I said sarcastically.

"You just want to suck the joy out of everything. Act your age for once and stop being so damn mature." she complained.

I simply laughed.

…

For my dinner with Chris I picked out an outfit that I felt could suit either occasion, a dinner with a co-worker or a date. I wore a plain black dress with matching triangle earrings, necklace and ring and paired it all with bright red heels. I wore matching red lipstick and straightened my hair. I looked nice but not like I had put in effort like I would have for a date. It was the perfect combination and I was rather happy with my look.

Chris looked absolutely amazing in jeans and a button down shirt. He stood up from his table when I approached and pulled me into a hug, "You look gorgeous." he told me as he pressed his lips to the top of my head.

OK, so this was definitely a date. I immediately became more self-aware; why had I not put on more perfume?!

"Thank you." I blushed as I sat down.

"I've been dying to talk to you about the Script." he said as he sat down.

So this wasn't a date. I instantly relaxed; I should have brought my script.

We ordered our mains, I had the pasta and Chris ordered a steak. For most of the night we delved into our interpretations of the characters and different scenes. How we would approach the relationship with our characters and how certain scenes would play because of that.

We both had different ideas on what we wanted the relationship between our characters to be but I was pleasantly surprised when Chris listened to my ideas with interest and even incorporated them into his views of the characters relationship. Even suggesting how we could both achieve what we wanted.

Eventually we settled on that my character had a touch of Stockholm syndrome, but only when Chris's character was in his charming and pleasant mode, not when he was in his violent mode. The charming mode could be a mixture of Chris's characters feelings towards me and of his manipulative streak to get what he wanted from my character. Which was important for me to know for my character to realize that the pleasant man she sometimes saw was just a delusion in order for him to get what he wanted, which is what ultimately motivates her to get her son to escape.

Strangely enough I began to liken the two different sides of Chris's character, to the two different sides I had experienced with Oscar. Not the kidnapping rapist part. 

There was the charming and charismatic Oscar that I saw interact with everyone on the set. Then there was the formal and cold Oscar that interacted with me. It gave me a good reference point on how to interpret my characters confusion at the two sides to Chris's character, forever uncertain to which side of his personality she would be interacting with.  Strangely enough it reminded me of Taylor’s song ‘Dear John. Specifically the line ‘wondering which version of you I might get on the phone tonight…’

The meal passed quickly and we chatted with ease, to extend our time together we even went so far as to order desserts.

I ordered the red velvet cake, Chris ordered the chocolate.

"That looks delicious." I commented as his dish was sat down in front of him.

"You want a taste?" he asked.

"Sure." I smiled, as I made to grab my fork but Chris dug his fork into the side of the cake and then held it up to feed me.

I was a little taken aback by the intimacy of the gesture but leaned forward none the less, closing my eyes as I closed my mouth around the fork. The cake was deliciously moist and tasted of sweetened dark chocolate.

As I opened my eyes and pulled away from the fork I saw that Chris was watching me carefully, his brilliant blue eyes seemed to have turned grey as he watched me with a hooded expression. The air around us sizzled with the tension that had suddenly developed between us.

"That's good!" I said after I swallowed, breaking the loaded silence between us.

"Can I try yours?" he asked simply.

"Sure" I said as I dug my fork into the side of my red cake and held it up between us for him to taste. I watched him carefully as he closed his mouth over the fork, leaning closer to me, so much so that I could smell his rich cologne.

He moved his mouth from side to side on the fork as he pulled back, his eyes alight with playfulness, "That is good." he commented.

I smiled in response as I spooned a mouthful of the delicious cake into my mouth, he was right; it was delicious.

As quickly as the tension had enveloped us it evaporated leading me to once again think that this was a simple meeting between friends, not a date.

"I should probably go. We have an early start tomorrow." I said as eleven o’clock approached.

"I'll walk you out." he said as he called for the check.

I immediately went in search of my wallet but he stopped me, "I've got it." he assured me.

I frowned; I was more than capable of paying for my own meal. I only let guys pay for me when we were on a date... Oh god, had this been a date? I froze in my seat.

"It’s been lovely getting to know my co-star." he said as he paid for our meal.

I released a breath I hadn't realized I'd been holding, so this had been a dinner between friends. That was a relief.

Standing Chris placed his hand on the small of my back and guided me to the door where we were instantly met with the flashing lights of paparazzi's cameras.

“Chris! Look this way, Chris!”

“Ophelia! Ophelia, over here!”

The typical calls of the paparazzi started to blend into one another as Chris walked me out to a waiting taxi. He politely opened the door for me.

“Thanks. I’ll see you at work tomorrow.” I said, turning to look at him with a smile.

“Yes. I shall see you tomorrow.” He said.

I leaned in to give him a hug, placing my hand on his shoulder. He had one hand on the car door as he leaned forward, but he at the last moment he turned his head and pressed his lips to the space between my cheek and lips.

The paparazzi went wild, snapping so many pictures I was concerned I was going to go into a seizure due to the flashing lights.

I froze as he pulled back, turning to look at him in confusion. He simply smiled as if nothing had happened.

Still feeling a little shell shocked I slid into the car, still staring at Chris as he closed the door.

What on earth had just happened?


	6. Chapter 6

"Ophelia Callis! Thank you for stopping to chat with us." Smiled the reporter.

I smiled back in response.

"Now it’s a big night for you. You’re nominated for two awards." He stated.

"Yes, I am."

"And a big night for your co-stars. Both Oscar Isaac and Chris Pine are nominated for best actor this year." He said.

"Yes, I'm so happy for the both of them. They both are amazing actors very deserving of their nominations." I said diplomatically.

"Who do you hope wins?" He asked, thrusting his microphone into my face a little too enthusiastically.

"Ooh," I said as I tried to think of a diplomatic answer, "You know what, I hope Leo wins." I said eventually.

"Leonardo DiCaprio?" He asked curiously.

"Yeah. I mean he's been nominated so many times and he never wins. There is a meme about how much he wants an Oscar. I kind of want to see him win just to see what the reactions on Tumblr would be." I smiled; pleased with the amount of truth I was able to put into my answer.

"You were supposed to say me!" Called a voice.

Startled, I turned around quickly to see Chris Pine had been listening to my interview, all of which had been caught on camera as he stood in the background.

"Sorry!" I laughed; I had not seen him in a month and was surprisingly happy to see him now.

"I feel so betrayed." He said, clutching his hand to his chest, "that's it! We’re breaking up!" He declared.

"Oh no, Chris." I pleaded with a laugh.

He laughed as he pulled me into an awkward side hug, pressing his stubbly cheek against mine. I closed my eyes happily for a moment, glad to see an old friend before I opened my eyes and smiled. The reporter was lapping up the public display of affection between Chris and me. Given all the speculation about the two of us dating, seeing us together in such an affectionate manner on the carpet was media gold.

The cameras began to snap away eagerly as Chris held me firmly against his side in a slightly possessive manner.

I felt a pair of eyes on me and as I glanced over my shoulder I saw Oscar watching Chris and I with hooded eyes.

My lips parted slightly as I silently tried to explain that this was nothing, just a photo op between friends... But the tight set in his jaw made me feel like he wasn't buying it.

Chris tugged me closer to him, forcing my attention back to him and I placed my hand on his chest to steady myself. The reporters lapped it up, shouting at us and snapping pictures with renewed vigor.

My smile became a little strained upon my face when I thought of how I had made Oscar jealous. There was once a time I enjoyed such attention from him. But this was not one of those times, not when our time was always so limited with one another, I didn't want it to be spent on jealousy.

...

I flicked through the news headlines, feeling the knots in my stomach tighten with each title that I read: "Chris and Ophelia Lip Lock Outside Restaurant", "Chris's Romance with Ophelia", "Chris and Ophelia: He's 33, She's 17!", "Chris's Hook-Up with Ophelia. Jen Silva left heartbroken" and the worst one of all "She's Dating Chris! And her parents are outraged!"

Jen Silva had actually sent me a screen shot of an article which featured a picture of Chris kissing me; her text read ‘that’s a date’.

My mother had spent all morning on the phone with my publicist and manager, who loved the fact that I was all over the news. My mother did not and she was fretting about my 'Good Girl Image' being tarnished by Chris. How dating an older man had thrown me into the whirl-pool of 'Child Stars that had gone off the rails'. 

My mother had of course confronted me about it, asking if my get together with Chris had been a date. And I'd answered honestly, "I don't know."

"You don't know?" she asked skeptically.

"When I agreed to it I thought it was just dinner between friends. And we did talk about the script but then..." I trailed off.

"But then?" she questioned.

"I think it might have turned into a date." I said carefully.

She stood staring at me in absolute silence for a moment before she nodded, "Alright." she said.

I blinked, "What?" I asked in confusion.

"As long as you didn't go out with him thinking it was a date, then that is fine. That means it wasn't a date." She said simply.

"What if he thinks it's a date?" I asked curiously, this was the exact question I had been wrestling with all morning.

"Do you know if he thought it was a date?" she asked.

"No." I allowed.

"Then it wasn't a date." she said again as she made to leave my room.

I have no idea what possessed me to say it, but my curiosity was too strong and it just slipped out!

"Hey Mum? What if it was a date?" I asked.

She turned around to look at me, "Was it?"

"No." I said quickly, "But if it was. Would you be ok with that?" she asked.

She stared at me for a moment, seeming to choose her words carefully, "Ophelia, I know older men can seem charming and make you feel like a real woman..." she began.

"Oh, my god! Mum, no." I said, immediately blushing; this had been a bad idea.

"But, no. I wouldn't be ok with it." she said seriously.

"Why?" I asked, ignoring the disappointed feeling that had developed in the pit of my stomach.

"A couple of reasons." she allowed, "First of all what would be said about you in the media? Darren and Buffy are right; you would be written off as just another child star gone wrong and I don't want that for you. Not when you have worked so hard and I know there is more to you than that." she explained.

"I don't want that either." I agreed.

"But the idea of you with an older man.... It's just a little too far outside my comfort zone and I'd prefer that you stick to men no older than you by five years." she said.

"Why?" I demanded once again, why was that strange feeling of disappointment not letting up. Why did I care? I didn't care. Did I?

"Honey," she sighed as she sat down on my bed, "You know I was a Shakespearian actor when I was younger. I was very dedicated to my craft."

"The fact that you named me after a character didn't suggest that to me at all." I said with a roll of my eyes.

"Well, before I met your Father, there was this man-" she began, I could see she was choosing her words carefully, "he was much older than me."

"How much?"

"Thirty years."

I didn't say anything but I was sure the shock showed on my face.

"He was directing the show I was in and he was... Very charming. Very handsome and charismatic. He knew his stuff and that was so attractive..." she sighed, seeming to become thirty years younger as she spoke, "He was hard on me and pushed me to do my best every day."

I watched her carefully, this situation sounded vaguely familiar...

"And, well, I thought I loved him. But it turns out he only wanted one thing. And he manipulated me until he got it." she said sadly.

"Manipulated you how?" I asked, I hated myself for asking but I had to know. I had to know what kind of world I was stepping into with Chris and Oscar.

"He told me things. Told me that he loved me. That I was beautiful. That he'd never felt this way about anyone before... All those beautiful lies men tell you to get what they want. And no one could lie like he could. If he'd told me the earth wasn't round, I would have believed him." she said dreamily.

"So what happened?" I asked curiously, I'd never heard this story. Or seen this side of my Mother before, where she was sharing the reasoning behind a rule she had with one of her own personal experiences.

"I slept with him, of course. A couple of times. And it was marvelous." she said simply.

I blinked in shock, "Wow. Mum."

"But once the show was done and I wanted to see him again, he dropped me faster than you could blink. I'd suddenly become too much effort for him now and he'd already had his fun. So he left me. Just like that." she said, a sad note creeping into her voice, "I was absolutely distraught. I thought I'd never fall in love again..."

"Then you met dad?" I asked hopefully.

"Oh no, there were a few more boys before your father came along." she grinned.

I giggled.

"But that taught me a very valuable lesson. Don't let yourself be used, Ophelia. Even if you think its love and that it’s real, it could all just be a game to someone else. So be careful." she said seriously.

I thought through her words, "It’s not just older men who do that." I finally said, feeling the strange need all of a sudden to not only defend Chris, but Oscar as well.

"I know honey. And you'll have to watch out for them too. But older men do it a lot better than boys do. Just remember that." she said simply before she gave my hand a squeeze and walked out of my room.

I sat on my bed for a long time thinking about what she had said, her words still echoed in my head as I tried to fall asleep that night; the only way to stop them ringing in my ears was to come up with a game plan on how I would approach the subject with Chris. By the time I fell asleep, I had a semi-formed idea in my head about what I would do.

Normally the drive to set and the tedious task of having my hair and make-up done before changing into my costume seemed to take hours, but that morning it passed in a flash as I was far too nervous about what I would say to Chris.

As the crew sat prepping the set for the first take of the day, I sat in my chair, scrolling through my twitter feed; Jen Silva, who was rumored in the tabloids to be Chris's lover, had tweeted the article along with the caption 'Christopher you cheating son of a bitch! ' jokingly. I'd responded with another joke in kind: ‘Baby now we got bad blood’ alluding to the fact that both Jen and I would be appearing in Taylor's video for the song, a little inside joke we were able to play.

I waited anxiously to see if Chris would comment on the exchange but he never did. Eventually  he came and sat down next to me in his own designated chair.

"Good Morning Beautiful." he smiled.

"Morning Handsome." I greeted before I cleared my throat and tried to sound casual, "OR should I say lover?" I asked.

He turned to look at me, his eyebrows raised in confusion.

I rolled my eyes, there was no way he hadn't heard what the media was saying about us. If my media team was chucking a fit, so was his.

"We're all over the news." I stated.

"Yes, my manager wasn't very happy with me." he grinned, not seeming sad about the fact at all.

"Neither was mine." I, in fact, was sad about the fact.

He shrugged and went back to looking at his phone.

I eyed him out of the corner of my eye as I chose my words carefully, "A bit silly, isn't it?" 

"What is?" he asked, looking up from his phone.

"People saying we're a couple." I stated, desperately trying to sound casual, "I mean, it’s ridiculous, because we went out together one time as colleagues." I said.

"Well, the media will start speculating over a lot less." he said as he continued to scroll through his phone, "I kind of expected it would happen."

How could he have known the media would instantly put the two of us together? And more so, why was he not bothered by it? He should be mad. His reputation was taking a severe hit; he was practically being called a pedophile by the news. And yet he seemed utterly un-phased by it all.

"Well I'm sorry for all the backlash you’re getting. Must be embarrassing, people thinking you’re in a relationship with someone so much younger than you." I said, attempting once more to come off as casual.

He shrugged, "I don't mind so much."

"You don’t?" I asked, my voice instantly betraying my curiosity.

"No." he said, simply, as he turned to look at me, "I mean, it could be true."

I blinked in shock as his blue eyes stared at me pensively, "But it’s not true." I said, trying to convince myself more than anyone else.

"It could be." he said simply.

I froze as what he said suddenly made sense in my mind, "Did you just..." I tried to form a complete sentence in my head before speaking, but my mind was in turmoil, "we can’t...wait, what?"

"Ophelia," he began, shifting in his chair so that he was facing me, "I’ve barely known you a week and I can already tell you’re a force to be reckoned with. I want to get to know you better. In something more than a co-workers capacity." he said simply.

My mind had been in utter turmoil before, now it was completely blank as only one thought occurred to me, "But I'm seventeen." I said dumbly.

"Hence why I didn't ask you out on a date." he replied.

"So it wasn't a date." I summarized. Well, that answered one question, pity it left me with so many more.

"No. At the moment we are just co-workers getting to know each other." he said simply.

"At the moment?" I asked picking the words out with interest.

"Well, while you’re seventeen, anything more would be inappropriate." he said simply, "but when you’re eighteen," he warned, "we shall revisit this conversation."

I opened and closed my mouth several times as I struggled to find something to say, to make his words make sense in my head because no matter how hard I tried they just didn't, "But my birthday isn't until March." I finally said, "Are you really going to wait that long?" I challenged, Chris was a guy. A very attractive guy who was very much sought after by other women, there was no way he was going to wait that long, we were only in September now.

"Unless something better comes along, yeah." he replied, a teasing glint coming into his eyes. 

I scoffed in disbelief.

I knew I was an attractive girl, being a celebrity you had to have a certain amount of confidence in yourself and your looks. But I had never seen myself as an object of desire by someone older than me. I barely looked at boys my own age because they were all so immature and while I did look at older men, I never thought they would look back. I still, in many ways, viewed myself as a gangly child, still pale and awkward. Perhaps it was because I was still cast in roles so much younger than myself that I now believed that was how I appeared to everyone, not just casting agents. It seemed that was no longer the case.

"You ok over there? You’ve gone pale...er." he said.

I blinked, breaking myself out of my own thoughts, "I'm just surprised." I said, simply, as I looked down bashfully, "I didn't think anyone, let alone you, saw me that way yet." I explained.

"You’re kind of hard not to notice." he said simply.

I blinked. Was I? Was I really?

"But hey, I don't want this to interfere with our work." he said.

"Neither do I." I agreed.

"Good, so just think of me as someone who is interested in the future, but not right now." he summarized.

"Ok..." I said, slowly, as I desperately tried to grasp the concept.

He simply smiled in response before he pushed himself out of his chair and went to the craft services table.

I sat in absolute shock, unsure of what to do. I reminded myself that this wasn't really a problem, that Chris agreed we were just friends… 'until you’re eighteen', said a tiny voice in my head. I instantly ignored it; there was no way I was going to be able to work with Chris if I kept listening to that little voice. I shoved those feelings of unease and confusion aside as best I could before I got out of my chair and headed onto set.

The next month was a strange one. There were no more dinners with Chris in which I went unaccompanied. Art always came with us now as a buffer and we were able to build up a nice rhythm between us all as we talked about not only the script but anything and everything. But I was forever mindful of Chris now. When he would hug me, or any alone time we spent with each other on set, I was aware of how he felt and how what could be seen as friendly greetings and conversation was anything but.

It made things a little tense between us, which Kathryn loved as it played beautifully well on screen, never mind the fact that I was so awkward and unsure around Chris now that I couldn't get through a day without blushing around him for some reason or another. I didn't tell anyone about what Chris had said to me because the inevitable question of whether or not I was interested in him would be asked and to tell the truth; I wasn't.

Through no fault of Chris's, he was absolutely perfect. The kind of guy girls dreamed of being with. But there was still a little voice in my head that said he was older.   

But I didn't let it affect my performance. If anything, I used it to help enhance it. I used it in those intimate scenes to help make my character detached and numb. Awkward in their affection and manipulation. That being said, I was pleased when we wrapped.

Not because of Chris, but because I would be able to get away from that little voice that whispered in my head every time I saw him.


	7. Chapter 7

I had barely been standing with Chris for a minute when Oscar approached; I turned to look at him, my heart automatically leapt into my throat. If I thought he had looked attractive from a distance, that was nothing to how he looked up close; he was clean shaven and his skin was beautifully tanned, his dark hair was combed back all paired with a tux that was fitted in all the right places.

“Hey,” he greeted, wearing a smile that did not reach his eyes, “Can I get in on this?” he asked.

He didn’t wait for a response as he slipped his arm around my back and placed his hand on the opposite hip that Chris had, pulling me close to his side.

Chris wasn’t having it as he tugged me back towards him.

I stumbled slightly; I was literally in the middle of a tug-of-war between two men. Neither of which showed the slightest hint of what they were doing, less the photographers should see.

This was November of 2014 all over again.

…

I'd never been to Croatia before and we were staying in the old town of Dubrovnik. I couldn't help but marvel at just how hot and dry the entire country seemed to be, or how old the city itself was.

As soon as I got to the hotel I immediately changed into my bikini. Jennifer had texted me when I landed that she and the rest of the cast were down at the beach. I had originally been hesitant to say I would join them but seeing just how beautiful Dubrovnik was and the glorious heat of the day, I couldn’t resist.

I tied a sarong around my waist, grabbed my hat and sunglasses to protect me from the sun before I grabbed my bag and headed out the door.

The beach was a stone throw away from the hotel and I walked down the beach on the wooden walkway I easily spotted the group.

Jennifer was lazing around in her White Bikini with Nick, Russell, Richard and Richard’s girlfriend Jenna. I’d met her when we were filming a few weeks ago.

“Hey look! It’s Ophelia!” called Jennifer pointing towards me.

Everyone looked up at me, calling out shouts of greeting and waving.

“Hey guys!” I waved as I descended the steps and stepped onto the hot sand.

Russell pulled me in for a hug, his shirt still wet from the ocean. Richard pulled me in for a tight hug, lifting me off the ground so my thongs fell off.

Jenna kissed my cheek in greeting; smiling so large two dimples had formed in her cheeks.

“Hey you!” said Jennifer as she walked past and grabbed my hat, placing it on her own head.

I turned to look at Nick, who was sitting in the shade of a tree.

“Hey.” He waved awkwardly.

“You’re not going to come and give me a hug?” I demanded.

“He hasn’t moved from that spot all day.” Said Jennifer rolling her eyes.

I laughed, “This is the reason you are so pale.” I said pointedly.

“This is how I’m going to stay pale and not turn into a lobster.” He said pointedly.

A ripple of laughter went through the group. It was then I noticed that everything was going a little too smoothly. There was a missing brooding and moody presence from the group, “Hey, where’s Oscar?” I asked curiously.

“Oh, he’s just coming in from the water.” Said Jenna pointing out to the water.

Before I could stop myself I followed her finger.

It was then something strange happened, my mind seemed to process things in slow motion as Oscar walked out of the water.

I blinked in shock; I'd seen guys with their shirts off before, having to work with them several times during the fact. But seeing Oscar's bare chest did things to me. I let my eyes wander over his defined pectoral muscles in appreciation, noting with interest that the muscles of his abdomen just ghosted through the skin and didn't bulge like some sort of steroid infused gym junky. His body looked sculpted and fit but not overly so. There was a small dusting of dark hair between his pecks that lead to a line down the middle of his stomach, ghosting over his belly button and down to his pants line. Out of nowhere I wondered what it would be like to run my hand through his chest hair, tracing the line down his stomach with the tip of my finger, feeling the hard muscles that lay underneath...

Blinking again I schooled my features into an impassive mask. No way was I going to be caught ogling him. The thought of what he would say if he did see me would undoubtedly be something of how immature I was and how I couldn't get over a little bit of flesh being shown. And he would be right. Why on earth was my heart suddenly in my throat? Why were their butterflies flapping in my stomach? And why was my neck suddenly unbearably hot?

“Ophelia, you alright? You’ve gone really red.” Said Richard.

“Fine.” I squeaked as I busied myself with taking off my sarong and laying it down on the sand, dumping my handbag beside it, “I’m just going to work on my tan.” I lied.

I actually had the exact same problem as Nick, if I was out in the sun too long I would burn. But I had put on sunblock back in my hotel, so my skin was safe from turning the same color as my hair. Laying down I fixed my sunglasses to my head and stared up at the sky.

What on earth had happened to me back there? Why had I had such a strong reaction to seeing Oscar shirtless? It was no big deal; he was just walking out of the ocean. His dark hair glistening in the sun… water dripping down his muscles… wonder what it would be like to lick water off his chest… wait, what?!

“Hey, Oscar, how’s the water?” asked Richard conversationally.

My neck was so hot. Was he near me now? Was he still dripping wet? Why did I want to know that?

“Yeah, really cold.” Said Oscar.

Cold! That was exactly what I needed! It would cool down the sudden heat I had on my neck and shock some sense into me.

“I’m heading in.” I announced as I sat up.

“I’ll join you.” said Jenna.

“I’m coming.” Said Richard.

I did not chance a look back at the group, less I see Oscar again and start to feel strange again.

The wet sand did not prepare me for the icy waters. I squealed against the cold and actually thought about backing away. But before I could decide I was suddenly swept off my feet.

“Russell!” I screamed in delight.

He laughed as he ran out into the water and threw me into an oncoming wave.

The cold water shocked me awake; whatever jet lag I had been feeling disappeared as the cold hit me with the force of a wrecking ball. I stood up and splashed Russell.

He laughed, water dripping from his grey beard as he splashed me back.

Jenna and Richard soon joined us and we spent the next hour playing in the water.

When we finally emerged from the surf, Jennifer, Nick and Oscar were all standing in a circle talking. I immediately ran up to Nick and flicked him with my wet hair.

“Cut it out!” he complained, shying away from the water.

I laughed as I pulled my hair over my shoulder and began to ring it out; as I did I noticed that Oscar had sat down with a sudden haste, staring out to sea determinedly. What was his problem?

“You guys ready to go?” asked Jennifer as she grabbed her bag.

She was still wearing my hat, I reached over and plucked it from her head and placed it back on my own head.

“Hey! Give it back!” she complained as she tried to grab it from me.

“Nah uh!” I laughed as I fought her off playfully. I held the hat high above her as she tried to jump for it. Sometimes it was nice being tall.

“You suck!” she pouted, giving up.

I stuck my tongue out at her playfully before I placed the hat back on my head once more.

“I’m stealing your sunglasses then!” she announced as she grabbed my glasses from the sand.

“Yeah, we still doing dinner tonight?” asked Jenna as she wrapped a towel around her shoulders. 

“Oh, yeah, we should! It will be like a family reunion.” Smiled Richard.

“All meet in the hotel lobby in an hour?” suggested Nick.

It was settled and we all headed back towards the ramp back up to our hotel.

“Oscar, you coming?” asked Russell curiously as he was still sitting on the beach.

“Just a minute, I want to dry off a little more.” He said, his voice sounded strained.

I eyed him curiously for a moment; something was definitely the matter with him. He was staring a little too determinedly out to sea. I shrugged it off, what did I care? It wasn’t like he paid any attention to what I did. And my strange reaction to seeing him shirtless had all but been forgotten when I was reminded of his stand-offish attitude. 

Going back to my hotel room I immediately jumped into the shower to rinse the salt water out of my hair. I had no idea where we would be going for dinner so I pulled on a nice purple dress and matched it with a pair of dark green heels. I pulled my wet hair into a long braid as I didn’t want the water dripping down my back.

Ready, I headed downstairs. I was surprised to see Oscar, Richard and Jenna already waiting. I had half expected Oscar to still be on the beach sulking for some reason. But he was there, waiting patiently for the rest of the group.

“Ah, the return of the technicolored shoes.” Announced Richard.

“If you like them that much I can loan you a pair.” I retorted.

“No, thanks, I’m good.” He smiled.

I glanced over at Oscar who was busy looking at his phone. I again got the feeling that he was watching me. It was just a little too suspicious that every time I looked at him he was deliberately not looking at me.

We waited until the rest of the group joined us before we went walking.

“So how was working on ‘The Room’?” asked Jennifer curiously as we walked arm in arm down the street.

“Grueling.” I said honestly.

“Really?” asked Jenna from behind us, “Working opposite Chris Pine all day sounds pretty good to me.”

“Hey!” complained Richard.

We laughed but I noticed Oscar didn’t join in; of course not.

After walking for a little while and working up an appetite we settled on a restaurant. I ordered the pasta, which was a little too salty for my taste but it was still good.

We all sat talking the rest of the night away like old times. It was strange to be reunited with the group after working with each other for so long. After being a part of a cast of three on The Room, I had forgotten what it was like to hang out in a large group of actors working on the same project. It really was like a family reunion as they shared the experiences of what had been happening in my absence and I told them about what I had been doing.

All in all it was a lovely night filled with laughter and fun.

…

My first day back on set was with Russell and Jen. We would be filming atop the walls that separated the city of Dubrovnik from the sea that would act as the walls surrounding Troy.

It was strange trying to inhabit the mad character of Cassandra again, after playing a character that was for the most part very still and silent in The Room, to now play a character that was skittish and crazy was a big change. I was glad that for the first few days of shooting I was just needed for background shots and nothing would be focused on me. It gave me time to get back into the swing of things and find my rhythm again. By the end of the week when it came time to film my close ups, I had Cassandra down pat again. I sat in a throne next to Russell and Jen as we pretended to watch a great battle rage beneath us, which the boys would all be busy filming in the month to come. Our filming was more reaction shots and no dialogue, a little boring but Jen and Russell made it fun. My last five days on set would be spent atop this wall again with Oscar, filming our one and only scene together.

I'd gone over our scene at least a hundred times in my head, trying to find all of my characters motivations, breaking down each line of dialogue to time my reactions. I felt almost confident with my preparedness when it came to the day of shooting. The scene was quite a small one so no rehearsal was needed. There were minimal people on set as everyone was tied up with second unit doing the battle scene. The smell of salt from the sea below filled my nostrils, stronger than it had been during the day as we would be filming at night. I enjoyed the smell, grateful I would be filming in a real set instead of a fake one for what was arguably going to be one of my hardest scenes to shoot as it was opposite Oscar.

I was wearing a pale blue roman dress that really set off the red colors in my hair. All the jewels that normally adorned my hair throughout filming had been discarded and instead my hair was down, falling into my eyes. I was covered in fake soot to make it look like I had just come from the burning palace.

I stood waiting on set, nodding hello to Oscar as a form of greeting. Which was ignored. It was nice to see something hadn't changed. I would just focus on my script today and do my best; there was nothing that could be thrown at me in this scene that I couldn't handle.

"Hey, guys," said Ridley walking onto set, his face buried in the pages of a script, "I'm gonna get you to kiss for this scene."

I froze. Except that.

I glanced at Oscar out of the corner of my eye, he seemed just as taken aback as I was, "Could you repeat that please?" he asked slowly.

"Well, I've been brushing up on my history and Agamemnon apparently had a love affair with Cassandra before burning her at the stake, so I'm thinking a little kiss on the cheek where you try to seduce her before threatening her." He explained simply.

I watched as Oscar's brown eyes flicked over to me for a split second, something akin to nervousness flashed in his eyes, but his glance was so fleeting before he turned back to Ridley I couldn't be sure what I had seen, or that he had even really looked at me. His jaw was tight when he spoke, "Shouldn't be a problem." He said professionally.

Could he be more of an ass? The guy barely spoke to me or acknowledged my presence and now he was supposed to try and seduce me and he treated it as if it was nothing? I stood silently fuming. Well, two could play at that game. It was a good thing Cassandra was supposed to be unmoved by Agamemnon's approach because I was going to be the ice queen. I would give Oscar absolutely no reaction. No matter what he did.

"Ok, Ophelia I want you over here, in the middle of the wall." said Ridley.

I did what he said silently, already turning off all of my emotions, ready for what was about to happen.

"Oscar, you start here." He said, pointing to a spot on the floor that was quickly marked with tape. "Before you like, stalk towards her." He explained as he came over to me, "Do like a complete circle around her, keeping your eyes on her before you turn around and walk away, kind of lazily, like you’re so sure this is going to work," he said.

Oscar nodded. I noted with interest his jaw was still taunt as if he was in some sort of pain or holding something back. Either way I knew his hopes of breaking through my ice wall of calm would be futile.

"Alright, Oscar, so you've just conquered the city, you’re lazy and tired. Everything is going your way." Said Ridley as he went and sat in his director chair behind the camera, "Hey, can someone open Oscar's shirt? I want some chest showing, I want this scene to be sexy.” Smiled Ridley.

I resisted the urge to roll my eyes as an assistant opened Oscar’s shirt, showing a hint of his chest. Placing his hands on his hips he turned around to face me.

I braced myself for the strange reaction I had yesterday at seeing Oscar’s bare chest, but I didn’t move my eyes away from his face. If I didn’t see it, I couldn’t react to it. My plan was fool proof.

"Ok Oscar, take a sip from the cup then begin the scene.” called Ridley, "When you get close enough, play with her hair or something. Ophelia, don't look at him until the last moment. Really build up the intensity before he brings you around to kiss you." He instructed.

Oscar nodded, seeming to look anywhere but at my face. Thank god or he might have seen me blushing. Wait, why was a blushing? Was it because I wanted to run my hands over his chest? Wait, why did I want to do that? Why couldn't I stop looking? Why was the back of my neck so hot? Wait, just what?!

"Action."

Oh crap.

I watched with far too much intensity as Oscar took a sip from the fake golden goblet, before he set it down lazily on the stone wall, his gaze finally meeting mine, "So you are Princess Cassandra." He stated, "My men tell me you’re a prophet. That you can see the future." he said simply, "Tell me mine." he demanded. The command in his voice echoing in the darkness.

I let my eyes bounce all over the space as I desperately looked anywhere but at Oscar's bare chest before I settled on his face, just his face. Don’t look down, don't look down, don't look down... I chanted to myself.

"Everyone wants to know their future, until they know it." I said cryptically.

Don't look down, don't look down, don't look down...crap! I looked down... How far down did that line of hair in the middle of his stomach go?

I flicked my gaze back up to his face as I desperately tried not to blush. I kept my gaze on his face determinedly as Oscar stalked towards me; there was something languid and calculated about his walk that reminded me of a cat, poised to strike at any moment. The camera followed him and stopped a mere foot away from my face, so that every reaction and breath would be caught with its sensitive lens.

"I reward those who please me." he said as he came closer to me, his bare shoulder brushing against mine as his hot breath hit my face, I stared out to sea determinedly; don't look down, don't look down, don't look down....

"The reward for assuring me of my future..." began Oscar as he moved in a lazy circle around me, his breath always fluttering against my skin, telling me how close he was... It made me want to shiver. But I stood perfectly still, "Would be great." he finished as he came to my other side, the front of his shoulder pressing into the back of mine as he leaned forward and delicately pulled back a strand of hair that had fallen into my eyes. He seemed careful not to touch my skin as he tucked it behind my shoulder, "If you should please me, I could be very good to you." he whispered against my ear.

At that I did shiver, there was something about his breath in my ear, the heat on my neck that did strange things to me. It made my knees feel week and I had the urge to dig my nails into something, to grip something tightly to hold me up.

"I could be a good master to you..." he whispered as he pressed his nose into my hair, his other hand coming around to cup my face and hold me to him.

The urge to turn my head and look at him was so strong I thought I might faint. I instead closed my eyes and tried to pretend I was somewhere else. It didn't work as I heard him inhale through his nose, breathing in my scent.

Don't move, for the love of god don't move... I begged myself.

I felt him shift slightly so that the front of his body pressed into the side of mine as he pressed his lips to the side of my face.

In romance novels I had heard kisses be described as 'seeing fireworks' something I thought was complete nonsense as I had been kissed many times and never seen fireworks. But now I realized you didn't see them, you felt them.

Every nerve in my body seemed to have boiled into a point that exploded as soon as Oscar's lips pressed against my skin. The slight stubble of his chin scratched against my cheek.

I had the strange urge to throw my head back, to expose my neck to him as I wondered what his lips would feel like on my neck. To combat all the strange sensations going on inside of me, I dug my fingernails into my hand, resisting the urge now to cry out in pain as I tried not to draw blood but cause pain at the same time.

There was a tense moment as Oscar took his lips away from my cheek, but held me still, as if he was waiting for a reaction...

It cost me greatly; I wanted to scream in frustration. But I didn't. I didn't give him so much of an ounce in reaction.

"Slowly turn your head and say the line, Ophelia." called Ridley.

I had all but forgotten he there, I knew that post-production they could edit out the sound of his voice but I had been so lost in the moment that I was almost annoyed at his interruption.

As I slowly turned my head, enjoying the feeling on my hair slipping through Oscar's fingers as I turned to face him, my eyes by their own accord went to his lips that I suddenly had so much more of an appreciation for now that I knew what sensations they could cause in me. I felt Oscar absolutely tense beside me as he waited, whether he was in character or he was actually tense I couldn't tell, but I noted that his jaw was taunt as I finally met his eyes.

"No." I whispered, my voice breaking the unbearable tension that had surrounded us.

Oscar held me for a moment longer, longer than he should have before he released me and walked away. I watched his retreating figure, still reeling from the sensation that he had caused in me. I found myself missing his breath against my skin...

The cameraman pulled back so that both of us were captured in the scene once more.

"You are no longer a princess of Troy." He said as he turned around to look at me, "If I wanted I could throw you to my men as a piece of meat even a dog wouldn't have." he said harshly, though his jaw was still taunt as he looked at me.

I stared back determinedly.

Whatever tension that had fallen away as he walked across the room quickly returned. I felt the air around me sizzle and crack from the heat of his glare which I returned. I felt myself grow hot all over.

"Cut!"

I jumped at the sound of Ridley's voice, quickly breaking the stare between Oscar and I as I turned to look at him, wondering what had made him call cut.

"That was brilliant you two! I loved it!" he complimented as he came over to the two of us, clapping Oscar on the shoulder as he did, "No need to do that again." he said, “let’s set up for the second half of the scene." he called.

I kept my head down as I practically ran over to my chair, flopping down into it utterly exhausted from the emotional turmoil I had experienced that morning. All I wanted in that moment was to sit and fall asleep in my chair. Propping my elbow up against the arm of my chair, I let my head loll to the side as I rested it against the heal of my hand, closing my eyes in thought.

What on earth had just happened?

I'd never felt that way in my life. I had done romantic scenes before. Hell, I'd even done a love scene once, which was like making out with someone in front of a crew of people. There was nothing romantic or steamy about it. But in that one take with Oscar, I had felt things I was sure someone my age should not be feeling about someone Oscar's age.

I waited for that little voice to come, to say he was too old, just like it always did with Chris. But it never came. It stayed deadly silent, which was even more worrying.

How is it I had always seen Chris as too old, but not Oscar. He was older than Chris! With Oscar there was none of that 'he's too old' business running through my head, I hadn't been able to think about much else other than the response he teased out in my body. How on earth had that happened? Oscar had been nothing but cold towards me, yet the moment he touched me my body had lit up like a Christmas tree and I still felt unbearably hot just sitting in my chair.

I opened my eyes and watched as an assistant handed Oscar a jacket.

Determined not to ogle his naked flesh once again I grabbed my phone and began scrolling through my twitter feed. But I barely saw the words as I was suddenly hyper aware that Oscar had come down and sat in the chair next to me.

I could see in my peripheral vision that he was staring at the set as he took a long drink from his bottle, he then looked down at his hands in his lap as he placed the bottle down by his chair, "So,” he stated casually.

I looked around, sure that he was talking to someone else. But I was the only one around. Was he talking to me?

He looked up at me, his face an impassive mask, "I hear you have a boyfriend." He stated.

I blinked several times in shock; was he actually talking to me? On his own free will? What? Wait, what had he said?

"What?" was my genius response.

He cleared his throat and looked down at his hands awkwardly, "I heard you’re dating Chris Pine.” He stated.

I blinked in shock; three months he never speaks to me. Now that he finally does, this is what he wants to talk about? Had he not felt what had happened before?

Obviously not as he stared determinedly ahead.

"I'm not." I said simply, I don't know why I felt the need to tell him that Chris and I weren't together. It’s not like it was any of his business, but for some reason I told the truth.

"No?" he asked, turning to look at me, his eyebrows raised in curiosity,

"No." I said simply, still staring at him in confusion.

"Good." Was his only response before he turned away and grabbed his drink bottle and took another long drink.

"Why do you care who I'm dating?" I demanded, eying him suspiciously, he had some ulterior motive. He had to; perhaps he wanted to tease me about dating an older man, call me a child actor cliché, whatever it was, I wasn't going to give him any ammunition.

"I don't." He replied simply, still staring ahead arrogantly as he finished drinking from his bottle.

I felt the hairs on the back of my neck stand on end as I bristled in annoyance, "Why ask then?" I demanded.

He didn't reply as he placed his bottle on the ground and got out of his chair. He didn't so much as look at me as he went back over to set.

What an arrogant pig! I asked him a question and he didn't even answer? I had answered his question. Which was completely unjustified and, frankly, nosy of him to ask.

He was just so... Infuriating! It was like everything he did was done to get a reaction out of me. To annoy me! Maybe that was what he had been doing when we had done our scene together; he was trying to get a reaction out of me to prove he could. And when I hadn't he had decided to engage me directly, to annoy me so much that I couldn't help but react to him.

Anger seeped through me as I threw my phone down and headed back to set, if I had been cold before, now I was practically artic. I let the daggers show in my eyes as I glared at him. Oh, how I loathed him! Yes, he was a damned good actor and he had a body that I knew now would haunt my dreams but he was just so annoying! I spent the rest of the scene impersonating the ice queen while I imagined whipping that smug smile off Oscar’s face.

After lunch Oscar was dismissed as I filmed the scene where I would speak his prophecy. I was not sad to see him go; but I noted with interest that as he walked off set, he turned to look at me over his shoulder. It would be the last time he would see me until we did the press tour for the movie together. No doubt he wanted to get one last rise out of me. But I didn't look up; I felt his eyes bore into me as if he were desperately pleading for me to look up.

Unable to take his gaze anymore I looked up, meeting his brown one with my icy blue ones.

Our gazes locked for a moment and something passed over his face, a sense of calm almost as if he had been balancing on the edge of a knife for so long but he had finally fallen and now... There was nothing. I stared back curiously, wondering what on earth was going through his mind and why he looked so oddly calm when he had been so tense before.

After holding my gaze for only a second he turned away and headed off set.

I blinked several times; I suddenly felt lost. That would be the last time I would see Oscar for at least a year and I suddenly wondered what he would be doing. Would he think about me? Did I want him to? Why on earth was I even thinking about him?

Taking a deep breath I pushed all thoughts of him aside, breathing easy in the knowledge that I would not have to deal with them for at least a year.


	8. Chapter 8

Neither Chris or Oscar were relenting on their holds on me. I stood smiling, slightly strained as I desperately tried to keep my balance.

Taking a new tactic Chris stepped away and turned to face me; I looked over at him and watched as he tucked a stray strand on hair behind my ear, running his finger tip along my ear as he did. He smiled charmingly before he turned to Oscar. Though his smile was still in place, I could see the challenge behind his eyes.

Oscar smiled back as the cameras snapped away; challenge accepted.

Uh oh.

Oscar moved to stand behind me; placing both his hands over my waist he rested his chin on my bare shoulder, holding me close to him.

The smile slipped from Chris's face and I could feel Oscar smiling behind me.

I placed my hands over his as I smiled for the cameras; this was getting out of hand.

"Chris! You’re needed over here!" called Chris's handler.

"Best you run along, Chris." smiled Oscar, still holding me possessively.

Chris smiled charmingly, his eyes turning to ice as he eyed Oscar. If looks could kill I had a feeling the two men with me would be dead.

"Duty calls." He smiled before he turned back to me. He very deliberately reached down and grabbed one of my hands, the one with the shoe pendant dangling from it. He bowed his head, keeping his eyes on me; he kissed the skin over my knuckles gently.

I felt myself blush under the heat of his gaze.

He then smiled once more at Oscar before he released my hand, turned on his heel and walked over to his handler.

I looked up at Oscar. He was not smiling.

"Well, that was fun." I commented as I turned back to the cameras.

Oscar didn't say anything as we posed together for a little longer. He moved from being behind me to my side again, his hand on my lower back holding me to his side.

"Ophelia! Over here"

"Oscar! This way, Oscar"

We continued to pose and smile. Oscar turned his head so his lips were at my temple, "You look stunning." He whispered before he kissed my temple affectionately.

I fought to keep my composure as my already burning skin caught fire. I desperately wanted to turn my head and kiss him back but I knew I couldn't. In front of a dozen cameras and hundreds of watchful eyes, I couldn't chance anything. I was surprised he was chancing a kiss while we were in public, on the temple or not. Chris must have really gotten under his skin.

I marveled at the fact that in two-thousand and sixteen I was at the Academy Awards when around this time last year I had been celebrating my eighteenth birthday.

...

Christmas and New Year’s passed with ease and before I knew it, I was back on the set of X-Men to film our final season. I fell back into an easy pattern of the familiar on the X-Men set but there was something different about it this time. There was a sense of finality about everything we did.

On February fourteenth I woke up in a bad mood on the day I dubbed 'Singles Awareness Day'. But my attitude was short lived as when I arrived to set that day there were flowers waiting for me. One was a dozen long stemmed red rose with a card that read, _'Happy Valentines Day-Chris'_. My heart leapt into my throat when I realized they were from Chris Pine. I couldn't believe that after all this time he was still thinking of me. I hadn't seen him since October. Surely he was just being polite and did not still have feelings for me.

I pushed that aside as I turned to the second bouquet of flowers, which was made up of yellow Hawaiian Frangipanies, my favorite flower. In my favorite color! I breathed in their scent happily; knowing whoever had sent them obviously cared for me a great deal as they knew what my favorite flower was.  I searched the bouquet for a card, plucking it out I read it carefully; ‘ _thinking of you’_. That was all it said. There was no name. Apparently I had a secret admirer.

I instantly wondered who it could be. Was it James? He had gotten me flowers last year as he knew how much I hated this specific holiday. Was it my mother? As far as she knew I hadn't had any male attention at all this year and she might have felt sorry for me... I really had no idea who sent them to me.

Smiling happily I snapped a photo of the two bouquets and posted them to twitter with the caption; _‘feeling very spoilt, thank you for my flowers’_. I didn't say who they were from as I didn't want to implicate Chris but I also wanted to thank whoever had sent me the yellow Frangipani, whoever they were.  

As April rolled around, I organized to have a day off so I could go and film my cameo for Taylor's music video.

Once I got on set and was presented with my outfit, my jaw dropped. I would be wearing black studded boots with high waist short shorts with a shirt that looked like it was made of black metal plating. I also had black gloves and, per my request as it would be a nice homage to my x-men character, a bow and arrow.

Putting on the outfit, I felt like a badass. My nails were painted black as were my eyes, all of it broken with blood red lipstick. I posed for my 'Character Poster' and headed onto set. Cara Develegine and Taylor were already waiting.

Cara stood twirling a numb chuck around playfully, "Oh, Babydoll in the house."

"Nice to see you, Mother Chucker." I grinned.

"You look so hot!" squealed Taylor, "Look at your legs! Oh my god you have amazing legs. And I mean that in a possible lesbian way." she grinned.

I laughed as I twirled a long black arrow between my fingers, "I feel so tough."

"You still look like you belong in a hello kitty music video to me." quipped a voice.

Turning around I saw Jen Silva enter the room wearing a similar get up to me, though she had a series of guns strapped to her.

"Oh, so you win an Oscar and you think you’re too good for us now?" I teased.

She made a kiss face at me, her black painted lips pouting slightly before she pulled Taylor in for a hug.

"Where is the rest of the squad?" I asked curiously.

"Some of them are coming later but most of them are filming tomorrow." explained Taylor, "I'm so happy with how your outfits turned out." she smiled.

I smiled back, Taylor had hand-picked all our outfits. I never would have chosen to wear something this bold but I wasn't showing nearly as much skin as Jen was, I eyed her strappy top nervously, seeing the amount of suggestive flesh it was showing; I was glad Taylor hadn't picked something like that for me to wear.

"Alright, ladies." called Joseph Kahn, the director of the video as he walked over to us, "Shall I tell you what each of your bits are?" he asked.

"Yes, please." said Cara.

"Alright, so you’re going to be holding a handbag before you pull out a pair of numb-chucks. Then we'll do a sweeping shot on you, to get your hero name." he explained.

Cara nodded in approval.

"Ophelia, I want to do a slow motion walk with you, go from the legs up, hair blowing in the wind before I get you to shoot an arrow that Taylor will block with her sword." he said.

"Wait, so I get to do one of those slow motion babe-watch walks?" I asked curiously.

"Yep." smiled Taylor, "It’s all about the legs honey." she winked. I laughed.

"Jen, I'm gonna get you to flip your gun and then do the pump action rifle with one hand before we will do a shot down the barrel of your gun." he explained quickly.

"Cool." she smiled.

And with that we got to work.

When Taylor wasn't needed she was getting changed into her next outfit or standing behind the camera bouncing up and down on the balls of her feet excitedly. Soon Gigi Hadid, Hayley Williams, Hailee Steinfeld and Selena Gomez all showed up on set. We ordered a big lot of junk food and had a fattening lunch. Ironic, because we were all wearing skin tight outfits. But I wasn't worried about looking good, when I was around the likes of Jen Silva and Selena Gomez, there was no contest. That being said, I still felt amazingly sexy and channeled that energy into my performance. All in all it was a fun day and for the first time I actually felt a part of the squad instead of being on the outskirts of it.

"I've been researching things in Australia that we can do for your birthday." said Taylor excitedly in between takes.

"Besides drinking?" I asked.

"Yes." she poked her tongue out at me, "Do you have any requests?" she asked.

"A bouncy house" I joked.

"Noted." she laughed.

"Are we invited to this birthday bash?" asked Hailee curiously.

"Of course." I smiled.

"Are you sure Australia is going to be able to cope with so many famous people invading your country?" asked Jen curiously.

"Hey! We have heaps of famous people." I defended.

"Like who?" challenged Taylor.

"Hugh Jackman! Russell Crowe...Cate Blanchet!" I listed.

"Wow. Let the Oxford dictionary know that heaps has been redefined to mean three," grinned Jen.

"Oh, shut up. You’re the biggest thing to come out of Brazil apart from Soccer." I said pointedly.

She opened her mouth to disagree but stopped herself, "Fair point." she allowed. 

We all laughed and I grew even more excited for my birthday.

My last day on the set of X-Men was spent doing wire work in front of a green screen. I was throwing people about with my 'powers' before I myself was thrown back. It was an intensely physical day, which was good as it distracted me from the fact that it would be my last day on set.

Even though I was the only one in the scene, everyone had shown up to watch my last take.

I was still hanging in the air when the director finally called those words, "Ladies and Gentleman, that is a wrap on Ophelia Callis."

Tears sprang at my eyes as everyone in the room cheered and I was lowered to the ground. James was the first one to pull me into a hug. He politely let me cry on his shoulder.

I could not believe the show I had been working on for five years was finally done. X-Men had been the start of my career and while I was already moving on to bigger and better things, I felt sad to leave this part of myself behind. It was like losing a safety net that I had, knowing I could always go back to x-men at the start of the year, no matter where my other projects took me. And now that was gone.

Everyone hugged and cheered me and I didn't stop crying. I even saw James wipe a tear away from his eye. We had grown close over the course of filming the show and I was going to miss him most of all; but I reminded myself that I would be seeing him for the Agamemnon movie promotion in November. 

Wiping my eyes I made my way back to my now empty trailer to get changed and pack up the last of my belongings.

As I stepped in the door I was greeted with a beautiful smell. There on the table was a bouquet of pink Frangipani. I picked up the bouquet and smelled deeply, Frangipani’s. Again. Whoever had sent these had obviously sent the ones at Valentines Day. I opened the envelop and read quickly, hoping I would discover who my secret admirer was; ‘ _Congratulations on your last day. On to bigger and better things’._

I flipped the card over. There was still no name. I hugged the bouquet of flowers to my chest. It was strange but on that card was something that struck a chord in me. Whoever sent them didn't see my choice to leave X-Men as a bad thing, but as a necessary step to move on to new things. One that I had earned. So I was indeed in need of a congratulations. But not only that I needed reassurance that I was going to move on to bigger and better things. My career was a gamble and I just hoped desperately that this particular gamble would pay off.

I wiped away a single tear that rolled down my cheek and went and got changed for the last time.

Going back home to Australia I did something I hadn't done in a while; I had a well-deserved break. I caught up with childhood friends and relaxed by the pool. I didn't know when I would get back to Australia now that my Mum had moved out of the LA house we shared and had moved back here. The rest of my year was going to be a little crazy, filled with new experiences and challenges, so I reveled in the familiarity that my Australian home offered. Knowing that I would not see it again for a while.

Everyone arrived a day early for my birthday party. Taylor had barely checked in when she landed to tell me to meet her at her hotel at Lunch tomorrow before she mysteriously hung up. My guess was she was making last minute arrangements for whatever she had planned for my birthday. By the end of May eleventh, Selena, Hailee, Cara, Gigi, Sarah Hyland, Maisie Williams, James McAvoy and many more of my friends had all arrived.

I awoke in the morning to the sound of my phone pinging with birthday messages but I ignored it as I crawled out of bed and went down the hall to my Mother's room. I immediately crawled into bed with her, snuggling up comfortably, "Happy Birthday my baby girl!" she smiled, pressing her lips to my forehead, "Big day for you." she commented.

"Big day for both of us." I corrected, "Don’t forget today is special for you too." I reminded her.

She simply laughed, "Would you like your present?" she asked.

"Yes, please!" I smiled.

She smiled and leaned over to her bedside table and pulled out what looked to be a photo-album. Sitting up in her bed I frowned as she handed it to me. Opening it curiously I was greeted with a little picture of me playing Snow White when I had been five years old, the flyer for the show stuck in along with pictures of me. Curiously I flipped to the next page, there was another picture of me, at age six this time dressed as a Kangaroo for my school play, the flyer was again suck into the page and I realized my mother had made a scrap book of all my performances, complete with pictures of me in character. The book covered everything from my high school plays, to my commercials all the way up to my latest movies, Agamemnon and The Room. Finishing with a picture of me on my last day on set of X-Men.

"This is amazing!" I marveled tears stinging at my eyes.

"There are still a fair few pages blank so you can add to it as you go along." she explained pointing to the back of the book, "I've been working on this for a while."

I smiled a teary smile at her, "Thank you" I sobbed as I wrapped my arms around her.

My mother had not always been supportive of my career choice, but when she saw how determined I was she relented and signed me up with an agency. Neither her nor I had anticipated the amount of success I would have and I knew how much it cost her to pick up her life from Australia and move with me to LA so I could peruse my career. Now that I was eighteen she had moved back to Australia to take more of a backseat in my life. A thought that both thrilled and scared me.

Seeing this book made me realize that when I thought I had been so utterly alone in all the hard work I was doing, my mother was right there with me. She had been there for every performance, every audition and every rejection. And this book was proof of that.

I sobbed into her arms for a solid minute. I had sure been doing a lot off crying of late. I hoped I wouldn't be so emotional when I got to my party with Taylor or I was never going to be able to save face.

As per tradition, I went out and had breakfast with my Father where he presented me with a beautiful gold bracelet, encrusted with a multicolored gemstones. I thank him and told him what I had been up to since I had seen him last, at Christmas.

My relationship with my Father was a strange one. He cared for me and I cared for him, but we did not talk every day. In fact we were lucky to talk once a month. I just didn't have anything to tell him, he wasn't interested in my acting career and that was what my life revolved around. So I tended to speak with him intermitted so I could fill him in on what had been happening in my life. We had a relationship that I described as 'aloof affection'.

After breakfast with my father I went back home and spent the rest of the morning fielding calls and birthday wishes. Jen Silva apologized for not being able to make my party as she was tied up with her Broadway show Heathers, but she promised she would introduce me to the wonders of Vodka when she saw me next. Jennifer Lawrence said she sent my gift care of Taylor and wished me a happy birthday. I didn't even go on social media as I knew I would be getting a lot of well wishes from fans and I wanted to take my time to thank them all for the birthday love. I got changed into a simple outfit that Taylor had instructed, wearing my favorite yellow heels I made my way to the ballroom of Taylor's hotel that she had booked for my party at lunch time.

The first thing that greeted me when I opened the door was the site of a massive bouncy house all set up and ready to go inside the ballroom.

I gasped in delight as everyone sang happy birthday as I entered. I was immediately enveloped in a series of hugs and well wishes as Taylor ushered me over to the snack table where there was a birthday cake. A multi-colored ice-cream cake. Taylor knew me too well.

 I waited for everyone to finish singing before I blew out the candles.

For the next three hours I became a little kid again; we all did. Even though I was easily the youngest there. We bounced in the bouncy castle, we played pass the parcel where I won a lollypop. We played pin the tail on the donkey and a bunch of games that I had not played since my tenth birthday party. It amazed me how into the games the grown people had gotten. Russell and Hugh were easily the oldest men there, yet they fought over the last chair in musical chairs like two kids. Russell won.

Once the majority of the party guests had left, I sat down with Taylor and the few girls that would be coming out with us tonight which consisted of the Squad and Maisie.

Taylor plucked her present from the table and handed it to me, demanding I open her present first. Curious I ripped off the wrapping paper and looked inside the box that revealed a beautiful set of leopard print heels.

"Oh my god! Taylor, I love these!" I marveled as I held the shoes up, instantly slipping off my yellow ones and putting them on.

"Not so fast! Mine are pretty awesome." said Selena as she grabbed another box from the table and handed it to me.

Squealing in excitement I tore at the wrapping paper to reveal another pair of heels, black with white spots, "Oh, Sel!  I love these too!" I smiled as I slipped off one of my leopard shoes and put on one of the heels.

As it turned out many of my friends had gotten me shoes; they knew me too well. I sat on the floor with everyone in a circle as I opened present after present.

Maisie had brought me the new IPhone, "So we can film our fun hotel adventures at Comic Con." she winked.

I laughed. Last year at Comic Con Maisie and I had the best time just hanging out in my hotel room. The night was filled with so many laughs she insisted we should have filmed some of it as it would make for a great comedy routine.

I opened one of the last boxes to reveal a beautiful pink dress with a cut where the stomach should be to make it look like a matching shirt and top ensemble, "Cara! Thank you so much!" I cooed.

"I thought you could wear it tonight." she smiled a rare smile.

"I will." I promised.

"Last one!" called Taylor as she handed me a small box.

Curious I ripped open the card first; something red fell out of it. Looking down on the floor I saw a red Frangipani flower fall to the floor.

My stomach clenched excitedly as I opened the card and read; ‘ _Happy Birthday’_.

There was no name and I didn't need to have my other notes to know the handwriting for this card was exactly the same as the other two who had sent me Frangipani flowers.

"Who’s it from?" asked Gigi.

I sighed, "I don't know."

"Ooh," cooed Taylor as she picked up the flower and tucked it into my hair, "Someone has a secret admirer."

I rolled my eyes, "Hardly." though if I was being honest it seemed I did.

Curious I turned to the box that accompanied the card and opened it. I gasped when I saw what was inside. There, nestled in the white velvet that came with jewelry boxes lay a golden shoe pendant, encrusted with diamonds on a long golden chain.

My mouth popped open as I pulled it from the box to show the girls.

A ripple of wonder and approval went through the group.

"Now I really want to know who sent it." said Taylor as she grabbed the card and examined it carefully.

"Do you think it's real?" asked Maisie.

"Who cares? It’s so you, Ophelia." said Sarah.

I marveled at the shoe pendant; after my mother's scrap book this was officially my favorite gift. Made all the more precious because I had no idea who it was from. Who was this admirer that not only knew my favorite flower, but recognized how hard I worked AND who had brought me the most perfect gift that not only showed they knew me, but they knew my personality? My brain itched with possibilities. The first being Chris. But I remembered I had received a separate set of roses from him on Valentines Day, why would he bother to send me Frangipani’s as well?

But I didn't let it bother me as all of the girls and I headed upstairs to get ready for the night ahead (after one final bounce on the bouncy castle).

We all went up to Taylor’s suite and got ready for a night out on the town. As promised, I wore the pink dress Cara had given me, along with the leopard print heels Taylor had given me. I also wore the bracelet my father had given me and the shoe necklace from my secret admirer.

Just as we were all dressed and ready to head out, Taylor came out of the bedroom with her Ipad, “So ladies, I know the video drops in a couple of days but I wanted to be here when you all saw it.” She smiled.

“Is this the bad blood video?” demanded Karlie.

She simply smiled as she placed the Ipad down on the table. We gathered around excitedly and watched with baited breath. The video was fantastic; it looked like a Zack Snyder feature film instead of just a music video. I squealed when I came on screen. There was a long shot of me walking towards the camera, which panned up from my heeled shoes, following my long legs before he panned up to my face, my hair was blowing in the wind. I looked absolutely stunning, but not only that, I looked sexy. Something I wasn’t used to. Suddenly the camera shifted to me pulling back the string on a bow and arrow, my hero name of ‘Babydoll’ flashed on the screen before I let the arrow loose. The camera tracked the arrow before Taylor jumped out of nowhere and blocked it with her samurai sword. The scene then shifted to Martha Hunt teaching Taylor how to use the sword.

Once the video was done we all cheered happily before we headed out onto the town.

The night was fabulous and just what I wanted. It wasn’t about just getting drunk, like most eighteenth birthday parties I had gone to, it was about hanging out with friends and having a good time. We had a lovely dinner together before we went out clubbing, dancing at the best clubs, then we went to a karaoke bar and sang our hearts out. The most fun I had though was when we were all simply walking around Melbourne joking and laughing with one another. Standing over the Yarra River and watching the sun come up with my group of friends will be a memory I will cherish for a lifetime.

After that we’d all gone to McDonalds for a greasy breakfast. The staff there looked as if all their dreams had come true at a bunch of famous girls walking into their grimy McDonalds and ordering a feast.

Once breakfast was done, we made our way back to the hotel. I was dead on my feet from exhaustion, as were most of the girls, and we all went to catch up on some much needed sleep.


	9. Chapter 9

Eventually my handler came and tapped me on the shoulder; I turned to look at her as she spoke into my ear.

"Ophelia, I've got a reporter waiting to speak to you." She said.

I nodded in understanding before I turned back to Oscar, "I have to go." I told him regrettably.

He nodded in understanding releasing all of me but my hand.

I couldn't cope with the distance between us. Not knowing the next time I would be able to touch him. I slowly walked away, prolonging the contact between us for as long as I could, I looked over my shoulder at him.

He looked after me regrettably. I knew we were being careless, staring at each other like this in front of so many photographers but I couldn't help it. They could think what they liked, I knew my PR team would spin it as just two colleagues who were fond of one another, but we were so much more.

As my hand slipped from his and I turned away and headed down the carpet for my next interview, I couldn't help but think back to a time right before things had become so complicated between us.

...

Agamemnon had finished filming back in January, but at the end of June they had done a bunch of re-shoots. Pick up shots that were needed when after editing the movie together, there were still a few shots the director wanted. I was only needed on the last day for a few reaction shots for a scene in the Palace. It was lovely to be back on set with Richard, Nick, Russell and Jen again. It was once more like a reunion of old friends as we all slipped back into our familiar characters that most of us hadn't been for six months. I was sad when Ridley called ‘cut' and that was it. The final shot for Agamemnon had been done. Now the only thing left for us to do was promote the film in November when it was released.

Ridley had organized a 'Wrap Party' at a Hotel for not only the cast but the entire crew. It was a strange occasion to know what to wear for; we would be gathering in the reception room of a nice hotel, yet the dinner and drinks for it were supposed to be informal.

I ended up settling on a red skirt and a long sleeved white top. I pulled my hair up into a bun and paired the whole outfit with my bone colored boots. I wore a matching set of funky earrings and necklaces like I always did. But for some unknown reason I decided to wear my shoe necklace as a bracelet. I'd taken to wearing it most days but today in particular I just felt like wearing it.

I drove my new car to the hotel, it was a little extravagant but I owned a bright yellow Porsche.

My LA home was nothing fancy, and I didn't wear a lot of designer clothes when I wasn't at a scheduled appearance somewhere, but the car had been one thing I'd splurged on. I had played a minor character in the Fast and Furious movies at little over a year ago and from that I had done a crash course in stunt driving. As it turned out, I was quite good at it. So this year, with my last paycheck from X-Men I had splurged and bought myself a Porsche. Of course obeyed all the road rules and didn't speed or do any fancy driving like I had been taught. But I'd taken to going out to a race track on the weekends and really putting the car through its paces. I, of course, had no idea about anything underneath the car's hood. I even needed help to change the oil! But all the boys at the track could testify that I could really drive that car. And I loved it.

Handing the keys over to the valet, I slipped him a twenty to make sure he looked after my car before I headed inside.

I was immediately greeted by Russell, who smiled when he saw me in the lobby. "Nice car." He commented.

"I will never love a human child as much as I love that car." I told him.

Someone chuckled and I turned around to see Oscar standing in the lobby. He had apparently found what I said amusing.

I looked at him incredulously, waiting for the frown that would replace his smile when he caught my gaze but it never came. Instead he actually smiled at me and headed inside.

I stared after him in amazement. That was odd.

I’d kept an eye on what all my co-stars were doing over our absence. Jen had been filming the last of the Hunger Games. Nick had been filming a small indie movie as had Rich. But Oscar had released an album and gone on tour. Which was different. I hadn’t given him much thought until now.

Russell lead me inside and I found Richard and Nick.

"What, no funky colored shoes tonight?" teased Richard.

"Got to keep you guessing." I smiled as I hugged him. My boots were on the tamer side of my shoe collection but they were still unique as the studs and chains wrapped around the ankle of it jingled slightly when I walked.

"Ophelia." Smiled Nick as he pulled me into a hug.

"Nick." I smiled as I hugged him back. 

"Hey, you’re here!" said a voice.

Jennifer came over and joined us, her boyfriend Chris Martin in tow. 

I released Nick as an awkward silence filled the space. This was obviously the first time Nick had been around his ex-girlfriend’s new boyfriend. Things were awkward.

"Why don't we go get some food?" suggested Russell loudly.

Everyone scurried off in opposite directions and I stood talking to Jennifer, "How are things?" I asked.

"Good." she smiled, "Chris just got back from London."

"What were you doing in London?" I asked curiously, addressing Chris for the first time.

"Filming a charity video with the Game of Thrones Cast." He smiled.

"That sounds awesome." I smiled, I knew Nick may have found it awkward to have Chris around, but I didn't want to make him feel unwelcome, "Is it funny?" I asked.

"Oh, yeah. Kit Harrington's girlfriend had an asthma attack on set from laughing." he smiled. 

I laughed, "That's gold."

Eventually we made our way over to the buffet line. After loading my plate I looked around awkwardly, Jennifer and Chris had gone and gotten a table to themselves and the rest of the cast already filled up another table. I decided to go and sit with some of the lighting people, not my usual niche but it would be nice to meet some other people who were involved in the movie.

I stabbed at my food awkwardly as the conversation around me dissolved into talks of light rigging and picture frame speed, none of which I understood.

This is what I got for sitting at, essentially, the nerd table in the High School cafeteria. I didn’t mind too much, they were all very nice. But I wished they would talk about something that I could actually join in on. They seemed to actually enjoy the fact that they knew something I didn’t and could walk verbal circles around me on that particular topic.

It made sense. Movies were such a big machine, requiring teams of people to bring them all together, yet it was the actors, the faces of the movies that were often given all the credit. So their resentment made some sense.

Though that didn’t make me feel any better about it.

The conversation stopped abruptly as everyone at the table seemed suddenly focused on something behind me.

Curious, I turned around to see Oscar, holding a plate and smiling down at me, “Is this seat taken?” he asked, gesturing to the chair beside me.

“No.” I said simply, a little confused as to why he would choose to come and sit with the plebs of the party.

“Thanks.” He said, sitting down he glanced around the table awkwardly as everyone continued to stare at him. I remembered how he had had the same effect on me the first time I’d met him. I smiled down into my food becoming acutely aware of how times had changed.

Suddenly a dollar bill was placed down in front of me, “That’s for you.” Said Oscar as he settled himself in his seat.

I frowned in confusion as I picked up the note, “What’s this for?” I asked curiously, turning to look at him.

“I owe you a dollar.” He said simply.

“You do?”

“Yeah.” He said simply as he turned to look at me, “You leant me a dollar because the vending machine ate mine.” He explained.

I blinked several times as a smile tugged at my lips, I remembered the first time I met him. I was more than a little surprise that he did.

“You don’t remember?” he asked with a smile.

“No, I remember.” I said as I turned around and grabbed my handbag.

“Well, I thought I better pay you back.” He explained.

I placed the note in my purse and turned around to face him again, “Thank you.” I said quietly, looking up at him through my lashes shyly, I was very aware that the entire table was watching us.

“You’re welcome.” He smiled as he took a sip from his drink, “It’s nice to see you.”

“It’s nice to see you too.” I said as a blush covered my cheeks at being paid attention from him. Three months of filming and he had never paid me any mind, now at this wrap party he was warm and welcoming.

“It’s nice to see you.” Agreed one of the female light technicians, staring at Oscar as if all her Christmas’s had come at once. 

We sat in an awkward silence for a moment, everyone else at the table too scared to talk in Oscar’s presence and I was just unsure of what to say.

“Did you see Jen and Nick?” asked Oscar, turning to look at me as he spooned a mouthful of food into his mouth.

“Yes.” I agreed, lingering on the ‘s’ sound as I thought of the awkwardness that had ensued.

“Little awkward.” He observed.

“A little.” I agreed, “That’s why I don’t think I could date anyone I ever worked with. I couldn’t handle that.”

“No?” he questioned curiously.

“No.” I said firmly turning to look at them, “I mean, working with someone all day and then coming home to them at night? Wouldn’t that be a bit much?” I asked, observing that it had been too much distance that made Nick and Jen break up the first time, then it had been too much time together that had ended their relationship the second time.

“Well, absence makes the heart grow fonder.” He said, staring at me with far too much intent.

“It does.” I agreed, turning back to my meal, unable to take his gaze.

There was sparse amounts of conversation throughout the table as we all finished our meals, but Oscar paid particular attention to me, which I did not complain about, but found absolutely mystifying.

“So I saw your movie.” He stated as we finished our meals.

I noticed he had waited until everyone else at our table was engaged in conversation before he tried to speak to me again because every time he had, someone else at the table had joined in and he had been forced to pay attention to them. Now there was no chance of us being interrupted.

“Which one?” I asked curiously, if he had taken the time out to see a movie I was in, I wanted to know which one.

“The Room.”

“Oh.” I said, a little shocked. That movie was only being screened for reviewers and big-wigs in the industry before it dropped in November. I wondered why he had made the effort to deliberately go to one of the advanced screenings and see it. So he would not have been bored and trolling Netflix like I had imagined, he had actually gone out and specifically seen one of my movies.

“I thought you were fantastic. Very deserving of the hype.” He said sincerely.

“I have hype?” I asked curiously.

“Oh yeah, a lot.”

“Well, that’s nice to know.”

“I hear even the ‘o’ word is being thrown around.” He added.

I blinked in shock, the ‘o’ word as in Oscar? That was beyond my wildest dreams to be getting that kind of hype at my age, “No.” I disagreed, surely not me.

“Yeah.” He replied.

“What about you? Don’t you have an album now? Grammy award must have been thrown around, I’m sure.” I said, wanting to shift the attention off myself.

“Nah.” He said shaking his head as he reached for his drink.

I smiled, enjoying my first real conversation with him.

“Excuse me,” interrupted a voice, I looked up to see a woman standing behind Oscar.

“Hi.” He greeted turning around in his chair to look at her.

“I just wanted to tell you that ‘Never Had’ is like, my favorite song ever.” She gushed tucking her short blond hair behind her ear.

“Thank you.” He said politely.

“So great.” She continued.

“Thanks.” He said before he turned back to me, “I’m going to head outside for a smoke. You want to join me?” he asked.

“Sure.” I nodded, amazed that he wanted to not only to continue talking to me, but that he wanted to be alone with me.

I watched as he grabbed his brown leather jacket and cigarette packet, “Right now?” I asked in confusion.

“Yeah.” He said.

Taking a sip from my drink I stood up and grabbed my handbag, not wanting to leave it unattended. He placed his hand on the small of my back as he guided me out the door.

The cold night air bit into my skin and picked up stray strands of my hair and tossed them to the side as soon as we stepped outside, “I’m surprised you smoke.” I observed, as I leaned against the railing of the balcony, looking out at the lights of the city, “Being a singer and all.”

“Oh, I don’t smoke.” He said as he joined me by the rail.

“What do you mean you don’t smoke? You have a packet right there!” I said pointedly.

“Yeah, I haven’t smoked in ages. But this morning I just got up and felt the urge.” He explained.

“Are you going to smoke one now?” I asked as I turned to look at him.

“Nah.” He shook his head.

“Then why did you say you were just before?” I asked incredulously, nothing he was doing tonight made any sense.

“Because I wanted to get out of there.” He explained.

“Wanting to get away from your adoring public?” I asked sarcastically as I thought back to the women inside.

“Something like that.” He qualified.

“Aren’t you supposed to be this cool rock-star and you don’t even smoke?” I teased.

He scoffed, “I’m not a rock star, I’m just an actor who likes to sing.” He said simply.

“Nice.” I approved, “it’s good you have a word for it. You identify as one or the other, not both.”

“You don’t think someone can be both?” he asked, “You can’t be an actor and a musician?”

“No, of course you can. Many people are. I just think people should choose one. Stop being so talented at everything and give someone else a chance.” I explained.

“Should that someone be you?”

“Me?” I asked in shock.

He nodded, a smile tugging at his lips.

“No way. I can’t sing. I mean my shower head is very impressed with me but I could never do anything professionally.” I said, thinking of the absolute horror at singing in front of people.

“What happened? You tried to serenade someone and they ran away?” he asked.

“No!” I laughed, “Why, have you?”

“Have I what?”

“Ever serenaded someone?” I asked seeing so clearly the image of him singing to some beautiful blond who easily fell under his charms.

“No.” He shook his head.

“No?” I asked in disbelief, “No baby mamma’s? No groupies?”

“No.” He smiled, looking down at the street below bashfully.

Was he blushing? Had I made him blush?

“What, none? No groupies? No girls screaming to come on your tour bus?” I asked, “Oh my god, Never Had is like, the best song ever.” I mocked, putting on a fake American accent.

He looked up at me seriously, “Best song ever?” he asked.

“Like totally, so awesome and wow.” I mocked, making the twang in my accent more pronounced.

“That song, I like wrote it in two hours, it almost didn’t make the album. It’s crazy that people like it so much.” He said simply.

“I’m sure it’s really good.”

He eyed me, “Have you never heard the song?”

“Well, not really, no.” I stuttered, feeling suddenly guilty, “I mean, I bet if I heard it, I’d know it. But no, it’s not something I’ve sought out and heard.” I explained.

A small smile splayed across his lips as he looked at me for the longest time, I grew uncomfortable and bashful under his stare.

“It’s ok.” He assured, “You’re just telling me that you’re not with it.” He teased.

“I’m so not.” I agreed, “My version of cool is playing monopoly with my mother on a Friday night.” I revealed, I had the sudden urge to prove to him how uncool I was to make him not feel bad that I had not listened to his song.

“That’s so wild.” He smiled.

“I know!” I agreed sarcastically.

We laughed for a moment, before we fell into an uneasy silence.

“I’m sorry.” I apologized, how insulting was it that someone had not listened to your song? Probably as insulting as not seeing the movie someone was in. But he had seen my movie, so I still felt the need to apologize.

“No apology necessary.” He assured me.

“I would like to hear you play.” I said sincerely, “It’s pathetic that I haven’t heard your song.”

“No, it’s not.” He disagreed as he shifted to stand in front of me, “Just means you’re one of the few people here talking to me for who I am, not because of what I do.”

He stared at me so intently that the urge to look away was strong. After spending three months not looking at me, he seemed to be making up for it tonight. Not only did he stare at me, but there was intent behind his stare and he did not shy away when I stared back.

A strange silence crept in around us that was not awkward, but tense. Laced with a million things that could be said. None of which were.

Eventually I smiled, unable to take the tension anymore and he smiled back.

“It’s cold.” I observed, suddenly feeling the night air far too potently against my skin as I tucked a stray strand of hair behind my ear, “we should go inside.”

I was unsure if I wanted to go inside to get away from him because the tension between us had become too much or if I really was just cold.

As soon as we stepped inside, Jennifer bounced over to the two of us, “Hey! We’re heading to the after party! You coming to the after party? Please come to the after party! You have to come to the after party! You’re coming to the after party!” she said quickly.

“Alright.” Laughed Oscar.

“Ok, great.” Said Jenifer before she bounced away.

He turned to me, “You coming to the after party?” he asked scratching his chin.

“I hadn’t been planning on it.” I said honestly, I had planned to go home after dinner.

“Come on,” he said persuasively, staring at me with his large brown eyes.

I was helpless to refuse even if I wanted to, which with the possibility of spending more time with him was involved, I didn’t want to.

“Ok.” I relented.

His answering smile was all the reward I needed.


	10. Chapter 10

After doing one last interview I was ushered inside along with all the other distinguished guest. The seating plan for the Oscar’s was no small thing. Everyone had to be seated according to the movie they were in (cast and crew seated in the vicinity of one another), their importance (Brad Pitt seated in the front row, family and friends seated in the back rows) and room had to be made for whomever the stars brought as their date.

Apparently I myself had caused quite a bit of a problem seating wise as I was in two nominated movies. So I had to be seated near both of the movies cast and crew. The problem was eventually solved with the Agamemnon cast and crew being seated in front, with the smaller cast and crew of The Room seated behind. I sat in the merged line of the two movies.

What bothered me about the Oscars though was that it was not enough to have your name on your chair, as if giving you a row letter and a seat number was too complicated, but their was also a picture of your face with said name plate.

I took one look at the horribly outdated picture they had used for my seat and snatched the paper angrily; screwing it up and handing it to one of the ushers I sat down. Art, who was sitting beside me giggled.

Sitting down I let my mind wander as the rest of the guests filed in.

…

The after-party was taking place at some karaoke bar on the outskirts of town were we would all not be disturbed. I pulled my car into the parking lot; it was easily the nicest car there.

As I got out of my car I saw Oscar standing by the door, a cigarette in his hand.

"Look at you," I commented as I approached, "Being a true rock star. Complete with a pub dipped in syphilis." I smiled as I eyed the dingy bar.

He chuckled as he took a long drag on his cigarette before he flicked it into the smoking bin. Turning to the door he opened it for me.

"Thank you." I smiled as I stepped inside. I jumped in shock when Oscar came and slung his arm over my shoulders lazily, holding me to his side. The bar was mostly empty as a lot of the crew had decided not to come to the party, but Jen and Chris were in a booth by themselves kissing while the rest of the cast was at the bar ordering drinks.

Oscar steered me towards the bar and we joined them.

"Ophelia, you want anything?" asked Russell.

"Wrong country. Can't drink here." I told him.

"Wait, you’re eighteen, how old is the drinking age in America?" asked Richard.

"Twenty-one." Replied Oscar.

"That's just sad." Commented Nick. 

"Sadder than an eighteen year old drinking a coke in a bar?" I asked rhetorically.

"No, that's sadder." Said Russell.

I laughed as I ordered my coke and we all went back to a booth. I was surprised when Oscar slid in next to me, once again draping his arm over my shoulders.

I smiled as I leaned into his side and tried not to blush. He was certainly being very affectionate tonight. He must have been in a good mood.

"So, I must ask you a very serious question." He said suddenly turning to look at me as Richard, Russell and Nick all sat down and began talking.

"Yes?" I asked curiously.

"Yellow shoes, yellow car, is yellow your favorite color?" he asked seriously.

I laughed, "Why, yes."

He nodded, "I thought I heard you say on set once that you had a favorite pair of shoes, but you wear so many different colors I couldn't be sure which ones you meant. You wore the yellow so many times I figured it had to be the one." He explained.

I stared at him in shock, how had he gathered all that information about me? By simply watching me on set? He never spoke to me yet I had always had the superstition that he was watching me, even though I never caught him. Now it seemed I had been right all along.

"And you? What is your favorite color?" I asked seriously.

"Blue." He smiled.

I smiled back.

"Ophelia!" called Jennifer.

I looked up towards the karaoke stage and saw Jennifer flipping through the book, "get up here and sing a Cher song with me." She demanded.

"No, thanks." I called, "I'm good."

"Oh, go on." Encouraged Russell.

"No way, this would need to be something a lot stronger before I got up on that stage." I said simply, gesturing to my drink, "You go and sing with her." I smiled.

"I'm not singing Cher." He said dismissively.

"Come on, Gladiator, where is your sense of adventure." I teased.

"Alright, god damn it, I will." He said stubbornly as he got up and went over to the stage.

Nick, Richard, Oscar and I all sat laughing, along with everyone else in the bar as Russell and Jennifer did a very bad rendition of Cher's famous song 'This is a different kind of love song'.

Everyone cheered once they were done and Russell stepped up to the microphone to sing a song more his speed.

I sat chatting with Oscar, Richard and Nick, enjoying their company.

Just as Russell finished his song he called out, "Oscar!"

He lifted his head in reply.

"They have ‘Never Had’ on here." He said, pointing to the karaoke book.

"Serious?" he called.

"Yeah." Laughed Russell.

"Get up there and sing it, Oscar!" called Jennifer.

"Yeah." Called Russell, "Ladies and gentleman, Oscar Isaac!" he called and the whole bar started cheering.

He turned to look at me bashfully.

"Go on." I encouraged, I was interested to hear him sing the song.

"You know what, you should have lied." He told me, "You should have told me you heard the song and that you liked it."

"Why?" I asked curiously.

"Because then I wouldn't have to get up here and do this." He sighed as he stood up and walked to the stage.

I laughed and began cheering with everyone else.

Nick and Richard had left to go to the bar and Russell joined them to order drinks leaving me alone at the table.

"I've never karaoke myself before." Revealed Oscar as he came to stand behind the microphone, as the words for him to sing began to flash on the screen he looked over at me, seeming troubled.

I tilted my head to the side and smiled, what on earth could be bothering him?

"Sorry, I'm gonna stop." He said as he turned off the karaoke machine.

A collective "aw" went through the crowd.

"If I'm gonna do this, then I'm gonna do this right." He explained as he walked over to the other side of the stage where a set of instruments lay, he immediately grabbed a guitar and went and sat on the chair by the microphone.

The crowd cheered and I clapped along with him. I leaned my elbow on the table and propped my chin up with the heel of my hand. Waiting patiently for Oscar to begin the song.

“I've been gone for so long now,” he sang, “Chasing everything that’s new.”

He strummed at the strings expertly in between the line break.

“I've forgotten how I got here,” he turned to look at me, “I have not forgotten you.”

I smiled shyly as I listened to him play.

“We were just children but our eyes opened and you were all that I could see.” He sung still staring at me.

“Through the good times and the bad,” he sung turning back to the crowd, “You were the best I never had…The only chance I wish I had to take.” He turned to look at the strings as he strummed for a moment before he turned back to the crowd.

“But there was no writing on the wall. No warning signs to follow.” He sung.

I wondered who he had written this song about. The emotion in his voice was something I couldn’t describe. He had obviously written it about someone who meant a great deal to him. I wonder if the girl who he had written about knew it was about her. How did she feel about it? 

“I know now and I just can't forget, you’re the best I never had.” He sung.

Another strumming break where he stared at his fingers on the guitar, his jaw was taunt and he seemed to be holding back some deep emotions.

“In this motel, well past midnight. When I’m bluer than a bruise…” he sung as he turned to look at me again, his expression unreadable, “You come drifting in through the half-light.” He sung, “In your funny yellow shoes.”

I felt as if a stone had been dropped into my stomach as realization struck me. Yellow shoes. We had spoken about my yellow shoes just tonight, I had worn them the first time I had met Oscar. But how could he remember that? He had barely looked at me that day. He had barely looked at me for three months!

And yet he’d written a song about me. A song about someone that he had wanted, but never had. Did I dare to believe that throughout this whole time, Oscar had wanted me just like I had wanted him?

“And I hope that’s you standing at my doorway, that’s the scratching of your key.” He sung, his eyes never leaving mine, “And I hope this song I’m singing, someday finds you… wherever you may be.”

How could he have felt this way about me? The entire time and had not said anything?

Yet here he was, singing to me the words I had longed for him to say. Emotion welled up inside of me and pricked at my eyes.

“Through the good times and the bad, you were the best I never had.” He sung, “The only chance I wish I had to take.”

Why had he not taken a chance? Why had he let me believe for so long that I was nothing to him?

“But there was no writing on the wall, no warning signs to follow.” He sung, “I know now and I just can’t forget, you’re the best I never had.”

I had to look away; I could not take his stare any longer. Not now that I knew what it meant.

Everyone in the bar cheered signaling the song had ended.

I looked up at Oscar through my lashes as he came and sat down next to me, casually as if nothing had happened.

“So… that’s your big hit song.” I stated.

“That’s my big hit song.” He agreed, ducking his head slightly as he turned to look at me.

“There’s no easy way for me to ask this…” I began.

“It’s about you.” he said simply.

I nodded in understanding. I had guessed as much, though it felt strange to have it confirmed.

“I didn’t know you felt anything for me… let alone write a song about me.” I said quietly.

“Really?” he asked simply.

I looked up at him, he was so mean to me. So indifferent. Now to hear I had inspired a song? Was it so hard for him to imagine why I would have trouble believing him?

We sat in silence for a moment as I stared at my hands, “Why didn’t you say anything?” I asked quietly, turning to look at him out of the corner of my eye.

“You were seventeen.” He said as he scratched the back of his head, “What could I say?”

He had a point, “I’m not seventeen anymore.” I observed.

“No you are not.” He agreed.

We sat in silence for another moment as I waited for him to say something, what this all meant and where we went from here.

Eventually I could not take the awkward tension that surrounded us, “I should go.” I said, grabbing my purse.

“I’ll walk you out.” He said simply.

We walked out to my car in silence. I came to a stop by the vehicle, my mind spinning with questions over the revelation that had just happened.

"You alright?" asked Oscar as he turned to look at me.

"I just have so many questions." I replied truthfully, not trusting myself to look at him.

"Ask me." He said simply as he put his hands in his pockets and leaned against the back of my car.

I glanced up at him hesitantly, his face was open and his posture was relaxed when I felt so awkward and unsure. He had said to ask him questions, so I asked the most obvious one.

"Why were you so mean to me on set if you felt this way about me?" I asked seriously, shifting the strap of my bag on my shoulder, holding it for something to do with my hands.

"It’s because I felt the way I did that I acted that way." He replied.

I stared up at him through my lashes, that didn't make any sense.

"The moment you told me off in that pub, I knew there was something about you that just drew me in. So I watched you from afar, how you worked, how you interacted with everyone, listened to the conversations you had. The more I found out about you, the more interested I became. I knew I had to put that wall up as a cover. But you got under my skin. Everything you did just made me want you more and I couldn't handle that. Not when you were so young." he sighed, running an aggravated hand through his hair, "Then on that last day, when I realized I wouldn't see you for who knows how long, I knew that I'd fallen for you. That all my efforts to keep myself from you had been in vain." He explained simply.

I shook my head, "I didn't realize..."I trailed off, I didn't realize what? I didn't realize that he had feelings for me? How could I when he had gone to such lengths to hide them from me? He'd let me hate him all in an attempt to rid himself of his feelings for me. It hadn't worked.

"Why didn't you just tell me?" I asked curiously.

He sighed, "I tried to. Little gestures that made me feel better about how horrible I'd been to you. To try and repair the damage I had done."

"What gestures?" I asked curiously, I didn't remember him doing anything up until tonight.

He reached forward and grabbed my hand, touching the shoe pendant against my wrist for a moment before he let go and my hand fell back to my side.

I suddenly felt everything fall into place, "The frangipanis were from you." I summarized.

"I couldn't stand the thought of you out there hating me" he said simply, watching me carefully.

"I didn't hate you." I allowed.

"No I know. You idolized me." He grinned.

I blushed bashfully, "Yeah well, that was before I got to know you." I allowed.

"You have to know that wasn't me. The me I am tonight, that's who I always wanted to be with you. Someone who cared about you and listened." He explained, "I can't explain it but, you made me want to be better. You made me strive to be more just so I might be someone who might deserve you."

I sighed, he was saying everything I wanted to hear, and I was wary of that. But I couldn't deny the affect his words had on me, "I wanted to be better too." I revealed, "Though I was driven out of spite." I smiled.

He smiled back.

The tension in the air suddenly reached a boiling point. I had no idea where we went from here. Obviously we tried to move forward. But how could we? I was eighteen, he was thirty-six. Forget about what the press would say (they would surely eat us both alive) and the affect that would have on my career and reputation but what would my parents say? They had freaked out when I had dated an eighteen year old for a month when I was seventeen. How would they go when I dated someone eighteen years my senior? There was no use even entertaining the thought.

But that didn't stop every fiber in my body yearning for him, yearning to be closer to him. 

Perhaps we could still be in each others lives? Not in the way he wanted. If I was being truthful, not it the way I wanted either. But still in each other's lives. As friends. Though I did not like applying that word to us, I knew it was all we could ever be.

An icy wind blew through the parking lot, picking up strands of my hair and tossing them about. A shiver went down my spine and I became acutely aware of how awkward it was for the two of us to be standing in a deserted parking yard in the middle of the night.

“So where do you live?” I asked suddenly, my mind jumping to the first question I could think of, “Because I don’t think I actually know where you live.” I explained.

If we were going to make this work I should probably knew where he at least spent the majority of his time.

“I don’t really live anywhere right now.” He said, his head ducked slightly, “I live out of a suitcase. Because I’m on tour.”

I nodded in understanding, “I live in a city called Melbourne.” I explained.

 “Oh yeah I’ve heard of Melbourne.” He nodded, leaning back against the car with a little more ease.

Though we were both working to keep the conversation light and casual, both of us knew there was something more. The serious undertones of our voices were obvious to even me.

“You ever go there?” I asked, trying to keep the hopefulness out of my voice.

“No.”

I couldn’t leave without some sort of hope. A way to hope that someday things might work out and we could be together.

“Well I’ll just give you my number.” I said, stepping forward I reached into his jacket pocket, fumbling with the leather as I pulled out his phone, “In case your ever in the country and want to catch up.” I clarified as I punched my phone number into his phone, “For like a vegemite sandwich or something.” I shrugged trying to lighten the mood that had rapidly plummeted in the last few seconds.

I tried to tell myself it was the cold making my nose red and my eyes want to water. I did not have the urge to cry. He had a career like me that he put first. It was not a rejection but a business move that I could understand.

As I moved to the phone back in his jacket pocket his hand wrapped around my wrist, holding me in place as he leaned forward.

I could feel his breath on my face as I continued to look down at our hands. I knew what he was doing. And I very much wanted to tilt back my head and capture his lips with my own. But I knew we couldn’t.

His hands held me in place as he leaned forward; his nose skimmed my eyebrow as he breathed in my scent.

“Doing that would be a bad idea.” I said quietly, feeling rather than hearing the break in my voice.

He pulled back slightly and I looked up at my lashes through him.

“Why?” he demanded, the first color of an emotion entering his normally passive voice.

His hands released mine as one slid up my arm and cupped my cheek for a moment, forcing me to look at him squarely, his brown eyes taking on a golden sheen under the yellow neon light of the parking lot sign.

He then began to trace my jaw line with the backs of two of his fingers. Back and forth in a delicate line that kept my gaze locked on his.

Though the gesture was surprisingly intimate, far more than we had ever physically been with one another, it felt so right I barely had time to register it.

In my mind then there were a thousand things that screamed yes, but only one that screamed no. So that was the one I told him.

“Because you’re older than me. Because of what people would say.” I said quietly, begging my voice not to break or for the tears I could feel stinging at my eyes not to fall.

He nodded in agreement as the flat of his palm cupped my face again, “I know. I know this is wrong.” He said simply, his eyes scorching into mine, begging me to do what I so desperately wanted.

I couldn’t move, even if I wanted to. Which I didn’t.

“It doesn’t feel wrong.” I murmured quietly.

His hand slid into my hair, gently pulling me towards him. I couldn’t take the distance between us anymore; I thought I would positively explode with longing; I knew he wouldn’t make the first move, so I leaned up on the tips of my toes and pressed my lips to his.

**Author's Note:**

> Hello Lovelies, I know this story is a little late, given that the story is mostly set in 2016 and we've just entered 2017 but I figured its better late than never. To find out more about the story and see all the little extras that go with it, check out my tumblr: http://teaenthusiast65.tumblr.com/


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